How to be more fearless in relationships?

Soo I know from the beginning when he met me, I was pretty fearless. I could speak what was on my mind. I could engage in conversations and speak up about stuff, and etc. This was way before we got together and when we were just friends. Well now that we've had sex and gone on dates and kiss and stuff, I've shut down. I don't mean to, I just feel scared I'm going to ruin it by speaking my mind or starting up random conversations. The motto of this year is "Fear doesn't live here anymore". I've overcome my timidness and shyness at work to a certain extent. I can speak up and stand taller and straighter now. But I still have to apply this motto to intimate relationships with men. I can speak my mind with anyone I see as friend or family but if it's a love interest, I shut back down again out of fear. Mainly due to my first bf experience. It's going on 8 years and I still haven't healed from it when it comes to getting in committed relationships. Well I really like this guy and we have a lot of things in common. Still getting to know each other by dating but it's going well. It's been 3 weeks now.

I started texting him like 3 text messages in a row last week when he didn't reply back right away. I do it out of fear bc I don't want him to lose interest. But this makes both of you lose interest bc it's annoying to get so many texts and to not receive texts right back. Another thing is I've started sexting him more than just simple conversation. I feel like I have to add in "sexting" into every text message. I don't want our relationship to just be purely sex. But I feel like I don't have much to talk about except sex, and it makes me feel like crap. There's sooo much I can talk about like Naruto, manga, Legend of Korra, or something nerdy, but I chose to sex talk. Ugh! I feel so lame. How can I get things back to normal before I push him away with all this needy behavior before it's too late?


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What Guys Said 1

  • i would at least tell him that you have trouble talking freely once you are in more intimate with someone. he might find it weird, specially if you talked about everything before, but at least he'll know why and he won't think that you are loosing interest


What Girls Said 1

  • No one gives a shit, girlfriend. Man the fuck up.. or lay down like a bitch and take what's coming to you? You will be respected when you stop asking for permission to be respected.

    • Kill yoself

    • Nah... Too much respect.

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