Who agrees that generally speaking online dating is great for females regardless how they look like but sucks for most average and below average guys?

Most of the time regardless if an average looking or below average looking guy has an interesting profile and despite that he sends an interesting message, to a woman around his age he has things in common with, and despite if he is messaging women in the same attractive level as him or below him, nearly all females regardless how they look like that read his message and look at his profile after that will not respond to his message. Since females have lots of options it has been proven that most only respond to good looking guys. Best option for average and below average looking guys is to meet women in person.

Make sure to read my additional details.
Come on let's be honest


Most Helpful Guy

  • Women receive countlessly many more times as many messages as men do. That's a fact. The reason is because men will frequently copy and paste the same message to tons of women to play the numbers game, as they don't really give a shit who responds. They just want p*ssy.

    That doesn't describe all men online, but it describes enough to cause women to get way too many messages to reply to. Because of that, they need a heuristic to help sift through all the messages, and pick the ones that pop out to them. Hence, the picture is what's most easily used to pick which messages to read. The rest simply go unread. This isn't a statement of shallowness of women, just a matter of practicality. If anything, it's the shallowness of the men who send tons and tons of the exact same message that leads to it.

    Incidentally, photo is how most men skim the search results, too. So in that sense, women with a less attractive photo will also probably get fewer messages than other women, because the other women are who the men will spam first. Though, they will still get more messages than men overall.

    That said, photo is not the ONLY thing women (or people in general) care about. Sending a good message can make up for other factors, because people are also attracted to confidence, depth, wit, and sense of humor, although I know you're feeling rather cynical right now with your "proven through experiments" line (what experiments? Were they scientifically valid/peer reviewed? Or more likely, were they just some random survey quoted in a magazine-type article?).

    That said, it's easy to put up a bad photo online, even if you're "physically attractive," so making sure your pic is the best it can be should still always be a priority. I find a lot of people who think they're unattractive create their own self-fulfilling prophecies by refusing to do things like take a good picture (or care for their health or their appearance in general) because they wrongly believe it's futile.

    • The experiments were done by different dating websites, many of them. And they put up AN EXCELLENT PIC of what most women would consider an average looking guy. AND THEN A GOOD PIC Of a good looking guy was put up.

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    • You didn't answer my questions about the "experiments," but whatever. Believe what you want

    • I did answer it, I said many dating websites have used these experiments.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Well, speaking for myself, I've come and gone off free dating sites a couple times over the years. Yes I tended to respond mostly to attractive guys, and then to people who struck me as personable and 'normal' in their message and profile... that can be a VERY limiting factor. What it always boiled down to for me is that I wasn't serious about meeting anyone that way. I am open to possibilities, which is why I would occasionally reactivate the profile just to see what's out there, and if something seemed interesting, so be it. But if nothing grabbed my attention, either visually or in the message/profile, forget it. I had too many reservations about online dating in general and just wasn't really looking that hard, so only the standouts got any attention.

    • I am glad you admit that you mostly only responded to good looking guys

  • I don't recommend online dating - a lot of people aren't who they say they are and generally speaking yes most girls only go for the "hot" dudes

    • At least you admit that most women only go for the''hot'' dudes online.

    • Why do most girls only respond to the good looking guys?

  • I don't know. I'm fairly average (but not overweight) and met guys online who were similar. Most of them said they had an ok experience online. It probably depends which site. Also, I wouldn't recommend online dating to anyone under 25.

    • It has been proven though by experiments done by dating websites in which they put a pic of a good looking guy then of an average looking guy. Tons of messages were sent to like hundreds of women. Tons of women read the message and looked at the profile. After reading the pick and looking at the profile nearly all women didn't respond to the average looking guy. Very few did. But with the pic of the good looking guy put up SO MANY MORE women responsed. A giant difference on the level of responses. And what makes you say about the under 25?

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    • Ok, let me tell you that I am a good, caring guy and that I am funny

    • Thays a great start! Just get out there and start meeting girls!

What Guys Said 5

  • The only problem is that usually the males that have to end up on online dating might have some sort of lingering issues that they are unaware of that made them undesirable for previous potential partners. Of course, that might not always be the case, but you know how it is. Those who are a bit more socially successful don't tend to end up in need of venturing online to find a potential partner.

    And there's a bit more to compatibility than "average and below average" looks, in fact, ""attractiveness level"" is pretty arbitrary and subjective. "Interesting profile" is subjective, "interesting message" is even more subjective, "has things in common with" depends on the two people at hand,

    If there is one thing important about all this, it's that you ought to put up a good picture on your dating profile. Not just one where you're just taking a selfie of you in a mirror.

    • It has been proven as well that regardless if you put your best pictures up if you are the type of guy that is considered average or below average looking by most women you will get ignored nearly all the time on dating sites. There have been experiments done by dating websites by them putting up a pic of an average looking guy then putting up a pic of a good looking guy. Tons of messages were sent to many different women. With the pic of the average looking guy only very few responses out of all the women that read his message and looked at his profile after reading his message. Now with the good looking guy he got TONS of more responses. A much much higher difference of messages then when the pic of the average looking guy was put up.

    • Well, of course. That's true for everyone. If you're more attractive, people will be more interested.

  • If you want to date, your going to have to face rejection part of the time. Yes, you may have to contact several girls before you find some that respond. Yes, that part sucks. But let's be honest, the barrier to get started is much lower with online dating. Perhaps the chance for initial success is higher in person (definitely keep doing this) but it's kind of nice to get a bit about who the person says they are even before the first meeting. Online dating sites aren't *the* option, just another option.

    • Did you even read my additional details? Dating websites have done experiments proving what I am saying that nearly all women only respond to good looking guys is right.

    • Yes, I read what you wrote and am responding with my own real life experience. When I was in college a professor told us how they worked for a CA govt job during the summer where they were asked to go out and collected data until they proved a particular result. Believe what you want, but when asking a question on a site that says "what's your opinion", don't be surprised when someone gives you one. Mine is based on my own experience not a study. I have met some pretty terrific people through online dating sites.

    • I said average or below average guys could get responses but they have to message like 100 hundred girls first before a girl that reads his message and looks at his profile after that responds. I am just saying that good looking guys get ignored A LOT LESS

  • women (and men) don't HAVE to reply to people they don't want to.

    • Who said they had to? I am asking who agrees that generally speaking online dating is useless for most average and below average looking men

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    • You're saying women have an easy time no matter what.
      but average and below guys struggle.

      How do they struggle?
      from people not responding to them?
      thus your assumption that women have to

    • I am talking specifically about dating sites. Average and below average looking guys could have luck in person but online it would be very hard for them. That is what I am saying.

  • It's your age.

    • Why my age?

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    • What do I do?

    • Be the best you that you can be.

      Work on yourself.

      Work on your game.

      Be aware of what is working and what isn't.

      Don't get discouraged because it will get easier.

  • Online dating seems really crazy to me