Is it true that when you get intimate with another person, you get insecure?

(By insecure I don't mean sexual relationship, but emotionally intimate)

I noticed that when I met my boyfriend and we started to date, he was (Still) obsessed with this 2 celebrities, and to be honest I just laugh and I couldn't care less because I knew he was never going to meet them. But now that we have been together for half a year, when he posts stuff (and comment their looks) about these celebrities or about other girls, I feel like jealous/insecure. I know that he doesn't cheat on me, and I never get insecure when he talks or go out with other girls. I was talking to him about this, and he told me that when someone starts to get intimate (emotionally, physically, sexually, etc) with another person, they start to feel insecure.

Is this true? Have you ever been in the same situation? Do you want to share your experience?

  • Yes, people get insecure.
    Vote A
  • No, people don't get insecure.
    Vote B
  • I believe it depends on each person.
    Vote C
  • I want to see the results.
    Vote D
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What Guys Said 1

What Girls Said 1

  • It can happen but for two very different reasons. The first, is that deep down you were already a bit insecure (tbh I think most people are to a greater or lesser extent) but being in a relationship gives you something to be insecure about. You want them to like you and so you read into their behaviour more. You see the other person's behaviour as a reflection on you, or how much they like you. You are also trusting them with stuff and that can be scary. Most people may worry about certain things that might not normally bother them - like did he put a x on the end of his message :-) but in a healthy relationship you should be able to maintain your self-confidence and be able to filter the things that really matter and the things that don't. You seem to be able to do this by acknowledging a celebrity crush is not something to worry about. The second reason for a person to become insecure in a relationship is that their partner's behaviour is something to genuinely worry about. You're not being insecure here, your instincts are reacting to red flags. If someone's behaviour is unacceptable that lies with them, that is not you being insecure. Only you can stand back and decide if you have good reason to worry about any of his behaviour. Its difficult for anyone to say without specifics, because it depends what the comments about other girls are. Just because he doesn't cheat, doesn't mean you have to like these comments if they cross a line and you think they're a but much. What' important is figuring out what's prompting you to feel insecure and whether or not those feelings are justified. Maybe try talking the specifics through with somebody neutral and see if they would be bothered by them. Hope that helps a bit!