How do I make this feeling disappear?

I decided to take a chance and go on date on Tuesday. The coffe date went well, and i didn't expect a date nr 2.
He texted me the same day and asked me for dinner the same day. I went to his place and we had dinner and it was so much fun and he cuddled and kissed me.. so i was like okay he probably got a good impression?
But he said i was such a good girl bc i havnt had done drugs and i dont party every weekend etc.
He suddently said.. im not the boyfriend material guy by the way, i want to be honest with you.
It suprised me because i didn't say i wanted a boyfriend and i got hurt.
He drove me home and kissed me goodbye, didn't mention another date.
Next day i texted him and i said thanks for the date and dinner and wished him a happy new years, and he replied saying thanks the same :) happy new years, and no date questions.. i did get disappointed

But at the same time im like ok do i want a guy who doesn't want to be serious? NO

but somehow im still upset because i havnt heard from him in 4 days.. i dont know why im feeling this way :( am i being needy?

I dont know why i am being so bothered with this.. it was 2 dates.. i mean i just met the guy,,
I feel like i was a respectful women enough to text him thank you and leave it at that.


Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds like he wasn't as much of a fan of the date as you may have thought.

    Either he was being a "player," and having multiple girls at one time or he figured out he simply wasn't into you. Either way, if he wanted to see you again he probably would have texted you.

    By saying he's not "Boyfriend material" sounds an awful lot like a guy who's trying to think of an excuse for not going on another date with you.

    I would try to forget about him, and if he wants to see you again, he'll let you know.

    • I know but why ask me out twice in a day if he didn't feel like he liked me during our first coffe date?

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    • Ye.. but is it weird that im freaking out.. and its been 4 days?

    • It's not weird to freak out about it, but it's probably not worth freaking out over. It's quite normal to wonder what went wrong.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • I am sorry. It is disappointing to like a guy (Or in my case girl) and have it not reciprocated. Just let this one go...

  • No your not being needy, your being completely normal.
    He was being a player and letting you know he will screw around with you but will also have a few other girls he's gonna do the same to.
    Find someone better.

    • I shouldn't contact him right? i mean if he was into me he would contact me himself? thinking that he managed to ask me out twice in a day

    • He's to occupied with other girls probably.
      If your upset now imagine what it could be like months down the line? Don't even bother with him.

What Girls Said 4

  • Well... maybe not be true in your case. But usually guys who behave like this only want to have sex with you. He stated it clear: he's not bf material (which actually means "don't expect me to be serious"). You also cuddled and kissed. He's probably just a player. Nothing wrong with you. Lots of guys are like this at that age.

    • he is 24 and broke up with his gf two months ago

    • Being in relationship with someone doesn't mean the 2 people were in love with each other. It's not always serious relationship.
      Don't contact him, don't approach him, do nothing. And you will see what happens. Better not spend much time thinking about him.

    • Ya i should just let him contact me if he really is interested?
      I feel like if i contact him im letting myself down and showing im someone who is okay with being used

  • Yeah leave him alone. Try to go out with your friends and forget about him. Dont ever change yourself by the way. Keep up being the 'good girl' im one myself. If he isn't boyfriend material and you want that, look for someone else. He might end up using you for his benefits in the end.

  • No you're not being needy. You both were having a nice time and then he says that? Who does that? So basically he left you hanging. It's like saying I like you but not really. Move on even though you're the innocent victim in this situation. Sorry sweetie. You'll find more mature. 😊

    • Ye i didn't know what he ment.. i was like okay so is he saying i like to fuck other girls.. so dont think this will ever be anything?
      I want to show im confident and i won't bow down to a guy like that, so i shouldn't contact him right?

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    • Ya.. doubt he will tho :p
      Thanks for helping!

    • Oh :( sure anytime 😐

  • You know what it's tough, I've got so disappointed by so many dates, it will go. I don't think it's being needy its just we have to tell ourselves if I choose to feel this way by responding to it negatively with worry and that good old word fear, then it owns our ass.

    But if you choose to love yourself first and be confident, positive and truly love your time to do what you want then something might just happen, I do think its good to go on a few dates, but don't imagine the idea of what you want it to be like think of it as meeting a potential new friend. I am so fed up of being single, last night I got really down about it. So today I went out with a friend had some lovely lunc and checked out men walking past. We had a laugh and taking that joy is better than worry and fear

    • I dont want to be used so i know its bad going towards him. Because im just causing myself pain.. but i feel so alone lately.. and we had a great time.

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