I don't know but is this love or lust or a crush, etc? HELP I feel helpless and hurt, what can I do?

Hey guys, there is this girl that since she moved to my city I been obsessed with her, I can't stop thinking about her at all for the past 8 months, everytime I see her I freeze and get shy. I believe I'm not her type. What can I do to get rid of these feelings? I don't know if it's a crush but I'm really hurt and it's depressing knowing that I'm probably never going to get close to her

Ps I'm attracted to her looks, but the way she is makes me fall for her even more, and she doesn't even know me ):


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hey! I'm a 16 year old girl and hopefully my advice helps.
    Since you don't know her, or know her personality, what you're feeling is probably lust (you think she's hot etc..)

    I say just ask her to do something casual with you (like get ice cream or see each other at a party). We aren't usually mean people (girls). The worst she could do is kindly decline, in which case at least you tried.

    A guy who I was friends with asked me out once, and I didn't like him in that way. He brought flowers and chocolate to my house, but I had to say no. I hugged him, and told him he was a really nice guy and that I was really flattered, but I only see him as a friend. It was awkward between us for a few weeks, but we are now friends again.

    I promise you she won't be mean. We aren't as scary as we look haha. I think most guys have this crazy vision that if a girl doesn't like him back, she'll laugh at him, and make him feel humiliated-but that just isn't true.. :) Ask her or you'll never know.

    I'm in the same situation by the way.. I really like this guy but he doesn't know I even exist. I think about him all the damn time. I feel you... just be nice and maybe compliment her (you have nice eyes, a nice smile etc..)

    Good luck!

    • This is a very helpful answer, should I try to get her to know me better before asking her to go to eat or something? Like get her to be more familiar with me

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    • I forgot to tell you, like I said I see her at school, but I don't know if she notices me. But i wrote her a poem and sensed the screen shot via Twitter to her, 5 min later she replied by saying she loved it and that she really appreciated with a heart. She didn't follow back, so I don't know if you know how Twitter works but, if she doesn't follow back after that she kinda was fake about it

    • 👍👍 you go girl

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • What do you mean she doesn't know you? Have you talked to her?

    • I wrote her a small poem, and I send that through her social media, she said she loved it, and she appreciated. Now I'll probably see her at school. I don't know if she's gonna know if it was me. Before that I use to see her at school a lot I just never said anything to her.

  • It's just a crush, and it will probably fade away soon.

    • It's been 8 months, I have never liked a girl this much. I had a mini crush her 2 years ago, but then she moved close to me

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    • Great answer thanks!

    • You're welcome.

  • I get that around people I like but I learned to fight it 👊👊

    • How do you fight it?

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    • Try to make contact with him, other wise nothing will ever happen

    • okayyyyy thank you :3

What Guys Said 2

  • my recomondation, get to know her and go from there, thats how i got my gf

    • How did you approach her the first time?

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    • thank you that sounds right

    • I see, I'm glad it worked for you

  • First take it slow, start with small talk just in passing. Do not let her know all your feelings at the beginning! Just try to get to know her then ask her out. You can't say you love her cause you don't know her. So right now it's probably crush/lust.