I back out every time a guy shows interest in me, help?

I have no experience with guys at all. I didn't date in high school, never really "talked" to guys or had them give me attention, and they usually went after my friends. So i had low self-esteem and it didn't help that i was shy.

So now i'm first year college, and I've had a few guys show interest in me and im not used to it at all! I just get scared or will be awkward and back out. What can i do to stop and just relax? I'm just scared, nervous and i have no confidence in myself because im afraid the guy will be disappointed in me or im just doubtful as to if the guy actually likes me or not... it's annoying and i can't help it.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Just take a deep breath and play it cool. First you should probably decided on weather or not you're interested in them too. Set up a first date and go from there.

    • There's this one guy im into, but i've been dragging it out now for a few months bc we both gave off shaky signals.. and then he made a bold move and it scared me. So now we're in an awkward stage, and i'm just scared. He asked me to hangout soon, so i guess i'll have to ask him to hang out to let him know but then what? like i keep thinking ahead, like what if it gets quiet? awkward? what are we gonna do? what if he thinks im boring? like all those thoughts pop up and hold me back. But if the guy is still trying after all that time, i guess it's a good sign and i really should do sometihng right? Guys normally wouldn't wait this long for one girl..

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    • Try to keep the feelings for eachother in the back of your mind. He likes the real version of you. The clumsy thing is attractive so just think of him as a friend who you might date and again, be yourself

    • Alright :) Thank you so much

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What Guys Said 1

  • That my dear is how "nice guys" think as well. At least you are already winning the battle and acknowledging you are shy (rather then many people who blame the world and become a victim). My psychologist gave me this awesome website https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/ Its an Australian DIY psychology site with workbooks on many common issues including self esteem and shyness. Try it out, it may help.


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