Picking up where we left off... where do I stand?

So one of my coworkers and I hit it off pretty well at a party I hosted back in November. I've always avoided dating coworkers in the past, but I feel like this girl is worth taking a chance. Things moved kinda fast between us, and we ended up sleeping together a couple times mid-December. Once the holidays hit, we didn't really see each other outside of work for almost 3 weeks due to conflicting schedules and family obligations. I'd walked her to her car a couple times when she left before I did, but beyond that we didn't have any real alone time. Last night we finally went out on a proper date. Did dinner and a movie, had great conversation, and I'd catch her speaking about future plans as "we" instead of "I" or "you."

I feel like I genuinely click with this girl, but at the end of our date it seemed like we took a step back. She said she was tired and she has to work a double tomorrow, so I told her I'd invite her in but I understand she's tired. We didn't kiss, we hugged, she told me she had a great time and she'd see me tomorrow at work.

I'm not the kind of guy that expects sex after a date, but I'm a little thrown off that we didn't at least kiss this time. The only two theories I have at this point are that it's been so long since we've been alone together that we have to get to that point again (basically starting over), or I'm heading down the dreaded path of the friend zone. I should also mention that we both were previously engaged, so that could also factor in somewhere. I genuinely like this girl, but typically I move very slowly; I'm a bit old fashioned. I feel like we're working our way from the ground up again, when things started crazy fast. I'm fine with pumping the breaks, but I'm just a little confused.

Should I ask her where this is heading and where we stand, or just play it cool and see what happens? I have some pretty strong feelings for her but don't want to screw anything up. Any advice is greatly appreciated.


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  • "Should I ask her where this is heading and where we stand, or just play it cool and see what happens? ", the latter.

  • Did you make any attempt to kiss her at the end of the date?

    Also your best bet is to play it cool and see what happens rather than rushing full pelt into things.

    • When we hugged I feel like I should have gone for it, but it'd been so long since we'd kissed I almost felt like the boundaries had been reset. I just wanted to be as respectful as possible and not seem like I just wanted to sleep with her again.

    • So if you don't go for it, then it's not going to happen. I would have at least kissed her on the cheek.