My boyfriend is treating me like he doesn't want me to be around but when I take it into consideration he starts to actually care?

Hey everyone, I just wanted to get some advice on why I feel like I have to fight for my boyfriends attention. We argue sometimes but, when I try to talk to him he ignores me for hours and i'm left there waiting for him to talk to me and it makes me feel alone, like I can't talk to him and he's like when I get mad I ignore you and that's how I am and I understand we aren't perfect and I love him for who he is. He calls me names sometimes and make me feel like i'm wrong for feeling this way. When I talk to him about anything when he's mad he just stays on his phone the whole time while i'm talking and when I tell him that i'm going to get up and leave his house and go back to my house, that's when he starts to care but why should I have to leave his house for him to see that us not communicating is hurting us and I've told him this before.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Your boyfriend should never insult you and you shouldn't insult him. That's a sign of an unhealthy relationship. What Error_204 said is pretty spot on.
    If you have no communication, your relationship will fail. Your boyfriend sounds immature. Tell him outright that if he can't talk to you about his feelings, then you plan to leave. He may show like he cares again but it'll probably just be a mask so don't fall for it. I would recommend leaving him.

    • You're right, and I don't insult him. I tell him that he can keep calling me names but i'm not going to call him a name. I told him months ago about our communication and I constantly kept telling him and he didn't see what I was talking about until months down the road and that's what i'm going to have to do. I'm going to have to just tell him that if this doesn't change I can't be with you. Then, that's when he shows he cares.

    • It sounds like you're the most mature, you want the relationship to work and you care for him. That isn't the case with him. You can find better, believe it or not.

    • I really do want the relationship to work and I care for him so much and that's what i'm stuck on. I just feel like sometimes he's emotionally unavailable at times and i'm trying to get him to open up more.

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What Guys Said 1

  • That's normal. It's called keeping it all.

    • what does that mean "keeping it all"? please enlighten me

    • Show All
    • Well, look, you can either keep the JIT boyfriend or ditch him. I mean you're not going to change him so there's that.

    • I don't know what to do, we've been dating for a year and it's just the same constant thing but thank you for all your help.

What Girls Said 1

  • He wants what he can't have-human nature.

    • I understand that but, I feel like I shouldn't have to force him to talk to me in general.