What's wrong with the messages I send on okCupid?

While I do get that this is a numbers game, I must be doing something wrong.
I send about 10 messages a day, I put thought into every message I write, and I get a reply to 1/100 or less.

I get a decent amount of visitors on my profile, and I get a decent amount of likes, and even the girls that 'like' me don't respond.

I make sure I never talk about how they look. I always say something related to their profile. And I try to end with a question or a conversation starter. No results.

I'll share a few of my recent failed messages. Maybe one of you could point out what's the problem.


Message 1 (She's a chef working with molecular cuisine):
You sound super cool!

I tried my luck with molecular gastronomy. Got all the chemicals from a friend who's a PhD in Biology.. didn't work out.. long story short.. I can no longer taste sour.

Are you working in any restaurant in the city?

Have a nice evening,


Message 2 (she named her dog after a cocktail but did not specify which):

I bet I can guess the name of your dog! is it 'Tom Collins'? Oh wait.. you said your dog is a she. Is it 'salty dog'? What am I thinking, no one will name their dog 'dog'.
Then it must be Mary!

It's kind of weird but nobody knows the origin the word 'cocktail'. But I think I have pretty solid theory.

(I was hoping she'll ask me about my theory but no such luck)


Where did I go wrong? Am I missing something really obvious?


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Try complimenting the ladies on their looks. Every lady loves a compliment.☺️ If that doesn't work, go on a different site... Or do what @mikedelsol said.
    That's all I have:) Good luck!!


What Guys Said 1

  • Using the word "cock" in your second message was a boner move :>)
    Internet dating sucks. Get out of the house and go where the people are: best is church/synagogue.

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