Little confused, falling for her and can't stop my feelings?

a little background story first of all, around 4 months ago now I started seeing a girl who I met at a party now she lives around 150 miles away so is a long distance thing.

Now she's one of the most amazing girls I've met tbh, we get on soooo well and feel really comfortable round each other straight away, kinda weird feeling as never had that, I've been in love before but this just felt different.

Now just before the 2nd time, She texts me the night before and says she is going travelling away for a year and thought she best tell me now.

we both can't really fully commit to each other because she is leaving this year, in around 9 months time.

we have had some chit chats about it and she keeps blowing hot/cold with me and keeps saying we shouldn't see each other and just be friends. Now the first time she did this I was fine with it really, but then after a week or so she miss me she said and can't ignore feelings, so we carry this thing on.

she's now done this 3 times and each time it hurts a bit more because more feelings are involved. Now last weekend i was there and she did it again but we carry on with weekend anyway and turned out to be an amazing weekend and she say to me 'lets jus do this, we do make each other happy and there is obviously something there' so im all happy and say yes!

2 days later she acting weird again and says we jus cannot do this blah blah, so I go along with it and obviously a bit sad about it just say to her 'ok, lets jus not talk for a while and be friends' she tells me change my profile picture etc because she doesn't want to think about it.

Then she texting me the day after asking if im ok etc etc, I ignore these texts then get a call and we kinda sort it out and she says things got to intense too quick and she got overwhelmed by it all, then she says to carry it on but not be so intense,

Saturday she text me telling me to get the train to her but i didn't.

really Unsure of what to do? like this girl too a lot

Couldnt fit it all in one message, she still wants me to come to hers this weekend and she still says I can go on Valentine's day etc too. But I just do not know whats for the best, all i know is I can't ignore my feelings for her and she said she can't too. She definitley seems to be doing a better job than me at the moment...
Yeah thats it now, it's been completely written off for her saying this for the 5th time now, says its a defo this time but this is what she has said rhe past 4 times too :/ im probably best just walkimg away at this point, do you think thats a good option for me right now? Probably the only option isn't it really :( mehh


Most Helpful Girl

  • I want you to think very deeply about this. She sounds very high maintenance, messing around with both of your feelings, and she's soon moving away. Is it worth the pain? I don't think so. I also don't think it's right of her to be playing hot and cold with you so much. She may just like drama and the idea of a "forbidden romance", but I may be wrong. Please just think about it. Would you look at mine please? Thanks!

    • Yeh I understand what you are saying here, she has said to me its not fair on me as im like the 'perfect guy' for her apparently she has said to me.

      She has said I dont deserve this her blowing hot and cold which has why she has tried to end it numerous times but then come back and said she can't ignore her feelings etc. I can't either which is why this situation is messed up :/

      I will do il check it out for u :)

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What Girls Said 3

  • Kind of sounds like she can't make her mind up if she wants to be in a comitted relationship while traveling.

    • Yeh sounda that way to me, she is a commitment phobe biiiiigtime, she was jus saying things got intense with us too quick.

      Stopping over at hers for like 3 days in a run and stuff and we were talking/txting constantly too so can sorta see why. Her last relationship was over 10 years long, so can see why she a little like this

  • Girls huh? Complicated. Give it a go. I know it's tough but she's still around for 9 months. enjoy the time you've got and see how it works out. She does sound like the complicated sort of girl though.

    • Well yeh this is what I've said to her but she's always come back with were jus gonna really hurt ourselves.

      Which is why i cannot understand why when she called it. off again the other day why the day after text and call me a lot and say lets do it but just not so intense?

      So we haven't been txting too much at all the past few days and only had one short phone convo with her...

  • Have you ever told her how you feel?

    • Yes We have both spoken about this, we have both said we really like each other a lot more than most people weve both met, its just really complicated as she's leaving :/

What Guys Said 2

  • She runs hot and cold?

    And you say "But I just do not know whats for the best,"?

    The best thing to do is cut it off with her; find someone new.

    • Yeah thats true man, i know its not her fault though and she doesn't mean to do it, she said she cares about me a lot and said she still wants me to come and see her but just as friends... not so sure i can do that

  • Just go with the flow.

    • Yeh thanks mate sorta am trying, it's just winding me up a bit tbh.

      not talking too much at the moment just the odd text here and there and I reckon i definitely am overthinking things.

      Like you say should just go with it and stop over analyzing, but easier said than done. I am just trying to not come across as needy and stuff, cos thats one surefire way to make her run completely the other way

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