I messed up everything and I can't move forward?

I messed up.
Me and this guy met in Nov. We were going on dates, and we had sex. He just he got out of a 7 year relationship a month before. In the beginning he even said "but I'd like to be with you aside from the sex is what you fail to realize" He even said it would be nice to have a girlfriend but he is looking for someone to settle down with. He texted me every day, told me he likes me a lot. We would hang out without having sex. He talked about meeting parents and maybe taking me to his best friend's wedding in May. He always holds my hand. When I was studying at Starbucks one night he came out to see me, no sex. one day he was acting distant and I went crazy texting him 50 times. he told me he was done. we went a week without talking and then we grabbed lunch 2 weeks ago. he paid, and we didn't have sex. The next day I invited him to my new years eve party, and he declined. he then told me he's not looking for a relationship. I asked him if there were feelings and he said "I did have feelings" and he said "Idk what I want and I dont want to lead you on." Then I asked if this was my fault and he said "it definitely isn't you" Then we ended up talking about meeting up to have sex and hang out. Before we met up he seemed hesitant and told me that he doesn’t want me throwing this in his face that all he wanted from me was sex. He also told me he doesn’t want me thinking this is anything more than what it is. We ended up meeting up to have sex and then we went to lunch. During lunch he said “you’re the best." Last week I asked him if he wanted to meet up to have sex and he said "can't have class" then I said "when can you" he said "idk shay in class can't talk" then I asked if he still wanted to have sex in general, and he didn't answer. Hours later I apologized for asking and he said "it's ok babe." it's been 3 weeks, haven't heard from him.

1. Did he have feelings for me or was he using me for sex?
2. Why did he hang out with me after I texted him 50 times?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Sorry to say you were a rebound for him. Never, ever, trust a guy who broke up with his long term girlfriend recently. Maybe he did it on purpose, maybe he didn't... the truth is, deep inside, he was looking for someone who could help him feel the void, distract him and mask the pain from his break up. The best thing you can do is to let go. I hope you're able to move on soon.


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What Girls Said 2

  • I think he was just looking for sex, and things since the beginning seemed to go to the relationship side, and he felt scared or like he didn't know what he wanted. Then he thought about it and dcided that yeah, all he was looking for was sex, and maybe he saw you had feelings and that he may hurt you so he thought moving away from you would be the best.

  • get over it