I've learned the hard way, too many times, that I'm a nice guy.
I'm beginning to get it that women want a strong, decisive man. --even feminist women want this. Sorry folks for the generalizations. But this is the reality that I've experienced.
Problem is: a woman might say something that provokes concern, like how she's treated badly as a pretty woman. But if I express sensitivity, as a good, sincerely interested listener, I risk getting dumped as a nice guy.
Things that some women say about women's place in society. I'd want to ask her about how I could find more about feminist views of history. But I wouldn't want to set myself up for rejection as a "nice guy." Women, in my experience, want the tough man.
Most Helpful Girl
If you view feminists and women as being sooo different and generalize them as all liking the same thing I think that's your problem right there. Stop thinking of people as categories and think of them as unique individual people who are not that different from you. I have rejected self proclaimed "nice guys" before and the reason was that they were not even nice! They would tell me repeatedly how nice they were but never prove it! In reality they were assholes and contrary to popular belief NO ONE wants an asshole, would you want to be treated like shit? no. Neither do women, we are all human we all want to be respected. There is a difference between actually being a kind person and only acting kind in order to get what you want so you have to be aware of that, other people can see right through it. My boyfriend is very sensitive and kind and really not all that manly at all, he's also a feminist. There are aspects of patriarchal society that are harmful to men as well as women such as the concept of masculinity. Men are made to feel inferior if they are not manly enough and if they show completely normal and natural human emotions they are made to feel ashamed! As a feminist I want equality and that means I have to defend men's issues and well as woman's issues and trans people's issues and everyone in between! Feminism isn't an us vrs them kind of movement it's more like the reality is women are at a disadvantage and we have to raise them up to equality along with other disadvantaged groups like transgender people, and if we can help fix some things for men along the way, why the heck not? haha My boyfriend got into feminism because his mom was abused by his biological dad and finding feminism helped him cope with those bad memories, he was actually the one who got me more into it!! The bottom line is no one rejects people for being too nice, but nice people get rejected if the other person just doesn't feel the same way. You can't force yourself to fall in love!0