He gets upset when I say no?

There's a guy who works at a bar. We're pretty much friends with benefits except he never expects us to "do" anything and we never have sex. Mostly, we talk and hang out like actual friends. But he calls me after work, sometimes drunk (he's a bartender so thats at like 2:30am) and asks me to come over. Its not a booty call, we never have sex and rarely do anything else (I've gone over several times), but he gets upset when I don't go over. He doesn't get mad but he'll give me a bit of attitude or try to guilt trip me. Why does he get so upset? We aren't dating and he hooks up with other girls all the time. Does he really like my company as a friend that much?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Because he's not getting his way, clearly.

    Doesn't make him a bad person, but it does make him kind of a childish brat.


What Girls Said 1

  • You have become his "live-in" crutch, be it buddy or "wife" so he won't be so lonely after work... few are around at that hour regularly, due to school/work/etc. coming up in morning. So yes, you likes, depends on you being there to kill the loneliness and allow his neurotics to finally go to sleep and find peace.
    For some reason this hasn't had enough steam to push further into GF-BF intimacy and beyond... why?

    • He can't do a committed relationship and I don't find him to be dating material for me. Which is why I refuse to have sex with him, haha. But we really enjoy each other's company so we are friends.

    • Perhaps these late hours would work better for you if you also worked with him & saved late inconveniences/safety by being roommates?