How do you bring up the exclusive talk without scaring the guy away?

what's the best way to bring up & talk about being exclusive? I don't want to spring a serious convo on a guy I've been seeing for 2 months, but I know that he's still actively looking on the online dating site because a friend who's on there sees his profile and it says he's online often. I'm pretty logical and understand keeping options open early on and not jumping into anything serious, but I'm at at point where I want to only get to know him better and not seek out or date others at the same time. I'm not asking to be bf/gf or label it, but just not lead each other on anymore if he sees me as only a backup option or second best. How do I bring this up without freaking him out? Do I start by telling him I'm not seeing anyone and asking if he wants to see anyone? Or is that too direct? Do I ask something more open ended, like, how are things going between us? What I really want is for him to tell me if I'm worth pursuing without still looking online or elsewhere. I would be upset if he didn't feel that way, but I'd rather know than invest in something he's only half interested in. Any suggestions? I'm trying to tread this carefully so it doesn't scare him since it's only been 2 months. If it matters, we're in late 20s.

What do you think?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Europe here. This exclusitivity talk on GaGs confuses me a bit.
    Over here it is more like, date one person and if this doesn't work out, you'll date the next. Not date 5 persons and after some month decide which one you want to stay with for some time.

    • Unfortunately that's the way it is, so what do i do?

    • Tell him you want to do things European way, then explain. lol

  • you do it after hot sex

    • Yeah that'll be an honest and accurate answer... haha

    • But seriously what do i say to him?

    • I've never had htis problem because i onlt date 1 at a time and am like that

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