Why do girls always say I have a boyfriend?

Few weeks back I approached a girl with an intent of asking her out. She is an acquaintance kind of a friend. She is in my college but we don't really get much time to talk properly. So I told her that she is a decent kind of a girl & I like her & wanted to spend some time with her. But then she blushed and told me that she has a boyfriend, then as I countered her by saying "that is a pretty classic way of saying that ur not interested". Then she was speechless for a while and was still blushing, but did not take a step back even though I was very close to her, physically I mean about half a meter. From that they onwards she is not able to look me in the eye when I talk or pass by. She is kind of scared of me or something. What should I do, I think she doesn't have a b. f, but response seem to be negative. I'm thinking of talking to her and telling her not to be scared of me and I'm not going to push on her. I really respect her & her opinion, I don't her to be uncomfortable, as I really respect her. WHAT SHOULD I DO. GIVE OPINIONS.


Most Helpful Girl

  • You probably creeped her out by calling her out on the BF thing - whether it's true or was just a line is none of your business and it was rude of you to pounce on her for it. What that tells a woman is that you do not respect her desires and her boundaries. So, yeah, maybe she is a little "scared" of you right now.

    The reason we so often use the "I have a BF" line is because it's the most effective way to get men we aren't interested in to leave us alone. When we just say we're not interested a lot of guys will take that as an invitation to keep trying. They think they can change our minds if they just keep pushing. A lot of guys, even those who genuinely think they are respectful of woman, will continue to push our boundaries to try to get what they want, instead of accepting the rejection and moving on. They do, however, respect another man's territory, so saying "I have a BF" will often do the trick where saying "not interested" will not.

    Here is an article that explains a little bit about this and why it is a problem. It encourages women to stop saying "I have a BF", which I don't fully agree with since we DO have to live in the world as it exists, but it does a good job of deconstructing the sexism that leads to us having to rely on this excuse:



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What Girls Said 1

  • when a girl says I have a boyfriend, she's not interested or taken, in this case she was saying that because she wasn't interested, but was thrown off maybe a bit embarrassed by what you said... just give it a little time then start talking to her again and be friends again.


What Guys Said 3

  • don't tell her not to be scared. that's kind of strange and making the assumption that she is scared.

    as for her reason for not wanting to date you. perhaps she is just making it up or perhaps it's true and she simply blushed because she felt a bit awkward. if she did make it up it's basically a way to let someone down easy.

  • Just smile at her knowingly, don't say anything to her. Eventually, she will admit she was just ha"'nding you a line, and may even agree to go out with you.

    Let guilt do its work..

    Yes, girls reflexively say this whenever you try to flirt with them. I always say, ". Me too! But we have an open relationship.'

  • Either she really have a bf or she's not interested AT THE MOMENT.
    Get to know her well and try again. I think it'd work if she really doesn't have a bf.
    Typical Indian girls -_-

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