Question for attractive women?

I'm always hearing about how the more attractive women never get asked out or hit on in their day to day because a lot of men think they are out of their league or that they think they get hit on all the time or they're just too intimidated for whatever reason. Would an average looking guy with an average job have a chance with you and if so what could we do to stick out and make ourselves more appealing?

Anyone else care to contribute?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Emphasize your strengths and favorite parts about you, take care of your financial and other responsibilities, take care of your mental and physical health. This is you being the best you, something attractive to everyone and anyone!

    To set yourself apart from just any guy... you would take your interests and find similar groups/communities thus already giving you common interest with any attractive girl you find in it.

    To set you apart from the guys with similar interests, compliment the girl on what you genuinely find attractive about her with no expectations. Don't expect a conversation or even a thank you. Why? Because when you act like there's an abundance of attractive woman out there and give a simple compliment to whomever passes by, you will attract more. This is confidence and is one of the tastiest bait.

    But most importantly, stay optimistic. If one pretty girl denies you.. Don't assume everyone you think to be attractive will say no. Instead think, "No biggy it wasn't meant to be. There's more women in the sea" Dont let a couple cute girls ruin it you for the attractive girls that ARE looking for someone like you.

    Finally, find things you like to do and go do them and go beyond... Put yourself out there. If you run into an attractive girl doing something you like, you immediately have something in common

    • Thanks, I'll try to keep all that in mind. Some of it is easier said than done but I'll do my best.

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    • @watermelonoma
      Thank you (:

    • Same goes for girls.
      As you age you realize it's not all about looks, because looks don't define you. Who you surround yourself with, how you choose to spend your time and money, and how you think of yourself and others does define you.
      You also realize that you attract like minded people/ same energy, if you don't like the people you attract... Try changing something about your perception on life. Don't quit until you get what you want. No matter how many times you fail. Embrace failure! Failing is good when you don't want just anyone. Failing means you're closer to the one you want.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Stop putting people on pedestals and treat them as equal human beings and maybe approaching those "very attractive" women won't be such a task.

    • I know they're human beings, rejection just hurts and it's more nerve-racking with attractive women because you rightly or wrongly perceive the chances of rejection as higher.

  • Most of what you said is TRUE! An average looking guy definitely has a chance with attractive women. Women want a man who will treat them well- respects them, caring, sharing, loving, attentive, honest, clean modern outfits, has other hobbies/interests, provider, protector. Good looks are nice but are not #1 on her list, if the woman is smart. Besides, many of the good looking guys do not treat women well. Good luck!

    • Thanks that's very helpful, I do personally feel like I fit those standards better than most men but how would I convey that to a woman I didn't know well but wanted to get to know better?

    • I would not ever admit that you've 'had a crush on her'. That sounds desperate and odd to me. You just have to be yourself, be confident when talking to her. Act like you have something to offer. Have interests to share and ask her out! "Hey, do you want to go out sometime?" Then you will know. To coffee or out to do something active.

  • I don't want to be obnoxious and assume I am one of those "attractive women", but I do take pride in my appearance and make an effort to be appealing, so I'll give my answer.

    I have never been asked out. I have never been on a date. And I've never had a boyfriend. I always had damaged confidence when I thought about that, but eventually realised that maybe i come across as intimidating because of how much effort I put into my appearance and style (because thats the line of work I want to go into!).

    I am a really friendly person and would never want a guy to feel like I am out of his league... that would make me personally feel shallow and as if I am facilitating self consciousness. Because really there is no such thing as "out of her league". There is only compatibility and confidence.

    I promise you, your average joe, with a bursting personality and confidence could outshine brad pitt.

    • You seem like a pretty sweet girl so I'm surprised you've never been asked out. I can see from your picture that you've dyed your hair red, I know that a lot of guys don't like obviously fake hair colors though there are also some guys who prefer it so it's something to consider. I also know that sometimes a guy just won't notice a girl if he doesn't know she's interested. This girl I work with started flirting with me and she even rubbed my shoulder once when she walked past me. Before she did all that, I had no idea that she was interested and I never paid attention to her. Now I'm pretty into her. Sometimes a guy will develop a crush on a girl if they develop an emotional connection with her or if he realizes that she has a crush on him. So my best advice to you going forward is to show more interest n a guy you like. If he knows you like him, he may decide that you're pretty cute. It can also make a guy uncomfortable but that's a risk worth taking.

    • Agreed, I'm surprised no man has ever approached you.

    • Aw, thanks guys, thats really sweet :)

  • I get hit on all the time.. If I get asked out it's because they want to get in my pants. I could give two shits less about what type of job they have. As long as a guy is nice, sweet and respectful I'd give him a chance. Average to you maybe hot to me.. who knows

    • As I mentioned below I want to approach this girl and tell her something along the lines of 'I've had a crush on you for a while and I wanted to ask you out but I don't really know you and I'd like to hang out platonically to get to know you first and if we hang out and you're not interested no hard feelings, would you be interested in doing something with me?'. Do you think that's a good idea?

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    • I'd prefer to actually tell her my intentions and get to know her, I literally know almost nothing about her and I don't want to just be dating her because she's pretty. It is why I am interested but I'd like there to be at least a little more depth to it than that. You've been a big help, thank you.

    • You're welcome

  • honestly i dont see why not attractive women are basicall normal women but they haveither been blessed with better genes or they are just more attractive than others. at the end of the day they just want security and to feel appreciated

    • Yes I can understand that but the thought is that they get hit on too often to appreciate it from just any guy or that they have high standards. And it may be easy to dismiss that type of thinking but you have to keep in mind that guys don't always get to see things from the female perspective.

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    • befriend her and after awhile maybe subtlely make it know you are interested. make her feel appreciated, do little things for her and let her know you care. mbe that caring understanding person in her life and thatd make her swoon.

    • Okay sounds like a plan.

  • You need to be honest. Attractive women hear lies and bs all day because guys feel the need to exaggerate themselves in order for her to like him.
    You need to be brave by nature. Be the man and take charge but stay respectful. Show her things she's never seen before.
    You need to be funny, and motivating. You need to learn about her personality and truly like it. Most men are with pretty girls for that reason only and they KNOW that deep down. So when a pretty girl feels like she's understood on on the inside and clicks with a guy mentally, it's game over.

    • So would it generally be a good idea to express interest in a girl and say you think you want to go on a date but you'd like to get to know her first?

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    • Well I'm not talking about anyone specific but if I don't know her then yeah it's about her looks if I do then it's a combo of looks and personality. And as to what makes me special, I'd be being direct and honest to her and also let her know that I'd want to get to know her before I go out with her. Maybe I'm being naive but that's how I saw it.

    • Most guys would just ask her out on a date but I'd be setting myself apart by telling her I cared about knowing her personality first.

  • oh gosh. forgive me, but this is a hugely shallow question. i hate that generalization. attractiveness is not objective. we all like different things. we have a problem in society though because people try to make it objective. if you like victoria secret model looking women, great. if you like more fuller figured women, that's great too. if you like dark hair , light hair. blue eyes, brown eyes, whatever. someone could go crazy over an overweight woman and think she's more attractive than what society shoves in our faces. so i know that 's not really what you asked but i say all that to make the point that you should go for what you want and not let society's rules bind you. you shouldn't try to make yourself more appealing for someone, you should do it because you think that makes you a better person.

    • By attractive I meant to imply hot by mainstream standards, I'm not saying that other women can't be attractive to some people but I thought people would understand what I meant. I'm not just into really hot women I'd say the majority of my crushes haven't fit that description but why would I want to sell myself short if I didn't have to? And by make myself more appealing, I meant more along the lines of what good traits should I place emphasis on/what should I work on improving. And I know we all have different preferences but there's no reason that someone can't give some things that a lot of women generally like as well as some things they like personally.

    • no i understood exactly what you meant, which is why i proceeded to say what i did. definitely not saying sell yourself short. but like another poster said, smart/sensible/not shallow women aren't prioritizing looks (maybe at a bar, but in serious, settling down relationships). i could definitely give traits that women like, but you specifically posed it as you catering to what "attractive women" want. which i why i was a little irritated because attraction is not an objective thing. we are all different. who knows what will attract the type of woman you're interested in. that's really what dating/exploring is all about. if it doesn't work the first, time, you try until you find the one. i apologize for sounding aggressive, just don't want girls who see this to think they're any less worthy of men trying harder because they don't look like they've walked out of a magazine. if anything you're only out of a woman's league because you're a jerk. (not you personally, just men in general)

    • Well to reassure those women I'd say that probably 80-90% of the crushes I've ever had were women who I considered to be average or a little above average in appearance. And I've known women who I've considered unattractive who my friends thought were hot and visa-versa. Not all men have the same tastes in what is considered attractive. If you aren't a supermodel then you can definitely get a decent guy, but if you feel like you're never noticed then you should put yourself out there more and show a bit of interest in the guys you like.

What Guys Said 1

  • I'm not a girl but Imma take you right now you're going to be fighting a uphill battle for her LOL

    • telling you right now*

    • If the effort makes you a better man in the process then it's worth it especially if you get the girl in the end :)

    • I agree and by the way I was just saying ^^