Does he see me as a rebound? Or a hook-up buddy?

There is a guy (K) that I have known for 5 years. We dated briefly when we first met (I was off at the time with my long-term boyfriend). I ended up going back to my boyfriend after K and I fizzled. We continued to be friends. My boyfriend and I dated off and on for another 3 years after that, whenever we were on a break, K and I would hookup. By the time me and my boyfriend FINALLY called it quits for real, K had a girlfriend who he then dated off/on for 3 years. When they were off, he would come to me.

We have a strange connection, it's very initimate and loving. But between our other relationships, we haven't really DATED since the first time we met. A few weeks ago, him and his girlfriend broke up (seems to be the final break). This is the first time that the both of us have been truly single. I consider him a friend. We hang in the same circle, and I care about him. He runs a bar that I frequent, and the past few times I've been in he has definitely tried to take me home. I refused. Politely of course, and I was flirty about it, but in the end I went home alone. I denied him because I realized I might want to actually date him and I don't want to be his rebound.

My question: am I just a rebound to him? am i just a hook-up buddy? is there anyway to salvage this and actually have him see me as a potential girlfriend?


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  • This is what you call friends with benefits.. You use each other for sex, you stop once one of you gets a gf/bf, and after the breakup you go at it again.