Online affair

i have dated a man online for 3 months. We talked every day and sometimes talked for 6-8 hours a day, cam too. Lately he was telling me that he was busy and he was less online, he lives out of state. Something just did not feel right about it, but he was always nice , telling me he loves me and that I am the only one.

I asked my female friend to add him to he's messenger, and he accepted it. He started talking to her, but he was talking to me too, now knowing that she is my friend. He was nice and playful to her, very sweet. She scheduled him to talk to him on cam and told him she has a surprise for him. Same day when I talked to him I thanked him for wonderful time and said good bye. He was mad, he was begging not to leave, I just said I have to leave you. have not heard from him that day. day later my friend had a online date with him at 2, they talked in the morning and he said he will try not to be busy at 2. we waited for him, he did not show up, she send him a message with a pic of us(friend and myself) and she just said "too bad you were not here I had a surprise for you and here it is" she received a message from him day later stating, you sent me a pic of my love, and he send me a mail saying "explain me what was that surprise all about" I did not respond, he also send me a message on messenger with the same question, I did not respond. I am really heartbroken, cried a lot, read his emails all day. He made me believe that I am special and out relationship was so special too. He never apologized for cheating, never said a word, after that day. It has been nine days now , I sent him an email this morning, just something from a friend. He was online later, did not try to contact me. And if he does what do I do. Is the online love just a game or ... it was just me. Thank you for any input :) is the reason he is not saying anything because he just does not care...or is he hurt that I did this to him ... I am just lost now..and yes I do miss him a ton :)


Most Helpful Girl

  • I went through something almost the same, and it comes to find out that in the end most of the time it is just a little mind game they play with us(or we play with them). The sad thing is, that most people feel like they are falling for them, but its not really love. Its a just this little fake world they build up around us. Yes, its very easy to fall for the game(trap), and to also fall in love sometimes. It hurts a lot, the mane thing that we have to keep in mind is that to them this was just like a video game. So in return we have to think of it that way. I know not easy to be done, but still you have to try and move on for yourself and others around you that care. If you don't move on with this you will end up hurting yourself, and another thing is that you will end up hurting the other people around you that care. And there is always someone out there that really likes you, but they are just shy, hard to see them. But give life another chance and look close to home this time, I'm sure there is some shy guy that has had his eye on you for some time. Don't end up hurting your self with holding onto this fake, and don't end up hurting the guy that never did anything but stare at you in aw and was too scared to say anything.


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  • Truthfully, I believe its hard to "love" online. Because people meet other people all the time and the thing is online dating is online dating and you odn't know if that person is talking to someone else as well as talking to you. I'm sure online dating works for many people, but at the same time other people use online dating as a way to get attention (an ego boost) and not for relationships. Don't waste tears on that guy... no guy is worth that. It wasn't you... it was just that the guy wanted some attention and be, what I call, an online man whore. And it sounds like he was trying to get between you and your friend. Be sure your friend knows what's up because it seems like they are probably talking. But I guess this is a way to note not to take online dating so seriously.