My girlfriend told me she has a crush on another guy. It's worrying me a lot. What should I do and think about it?

We love each other. I know she loves me. She is absolutelly honest to me, always. Yet, there's a guy in our school, who is actually a friend of mine, who she has a crush on. It's not just a little crush.
She told me that if I wouldn't talk to her before, she would be in love with him. He is way better than me, he is just her type of guy, he is possessive, calm, great music taste, gets angry when he must, cold, etc. She ignores me when we are with him, she gets really happy when she sees him and talks to him. She even dreamed she kissed him a few weeks ago.
What should I do? It's worrying me a hell lot. I love her, a lot. Really.

  • Talk to her.
    Vote A
  • Break up.
    Vote B
  • Ignore it.
    Vote C
Select a gender to cast your vote:
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Most Helpful Girl

  • TBH, this really only shows how good your relationship is! I know it sounds backwards but if she feels confident and comfortable enough to share this kind of thing with you- it's most likely a good sign!
    Remember, she loves you. And even if that guy was on the scene earlier and she would've gone out with him. She hasn't. She picked YOU. And she's not leaving you either!!
    Don't feel like you have to compete with this guy- that's the worst thing you could do. If you can show her that even though this guy may be 'competition' with you, you don't need to worry because you love each other, she'll respect that. Be yourself and the best you can be.
    Not that I doubt you give her attention but, maybe, you should show her extra affection- just to unconsciously remind her why you're way better! ;)
    Basically, don't let this crush get in the way of your relationship, your friendship, their friendship and all the good things! Be alert, but not controlling. Tell her your concerns and explain why. She loves you so she'll understand!!
    Hope this helped! Good Luck!
    Lucy xx


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • I would say it's not that big of a deal for her to have a little crush on someone... but it sounds pretty serious. I would not tolerate her behavior around him... especially ignoring you. That's not cool. If I were you I would try and talk to her about it, try to make her understand how you feel and also understand how she feels. If you feel like she's too into this guy then I would break it off. Like @tl656 said, if she still wants you then she'll try to get you back.

    • It's way more complicated than that. I can't break up and see if she comes back, because of personal issues I can't tell you here. But thanks for the opinion anyway

    • Yeah I can understand your hesitation without giving a reason. But if she's not treating you right you shouldn't just ignore it.

  • Dump her ass, she likes him so why the hell stay, I get u love her, but ur just gunna get more and more hurt the longer u stay

  • You really should talk to her, otherwise there's gonna be a point in your relationship where the feelings only are coming from one side. You don't want that, but good luck! :)


What Guys Said 4

  • Sorry for long text. I voted for A but I wouldn't say a total no to B. Look, you have to talk to her. Tell her you are concerned about this. It's not nice at all to ignore you when you are with him. She's your girlfriend but this doesn't show respect at all. The fact that confuses me but is a good one is that she's so honest. She has to get over him. If things dont work out, well, I think you should end it. On our age we can't actually "love". We both don't know what real love is. This is what I found out in my previous relationship without having people here on GaG telling me that. If it hurts you and doesn't work out jump out of the train and let her go. But it could also be just a little crush and she will get over it soon. Realize she has you by her side. Things are not always black and white :)
    Sorry for the situation, I know it hurts a lot :/

    • The first things you have to do is talk to her! Dont do any hasty moves

  • Okay, first things first.

    You're not going to like to hear this one, but you're 16. You're not "in love", you're a fish in a small pond at an age when your body is telling you to start seeking a mate. Everyone is SO IN LOVE at 16. I know I was. I was going to marry my first girlfriend, it was me and her against the world, etc etc... and we broke up during the summer.

    I'm not telling you this in a snide way or saying you're stupid. I'm just telling you that pretty much all of us have been there, that a miniscule, pathetically small amount of high school relationships move past high school, and that however you move on from this one, you'll be fine. It probably feels like the end of the world, but it's not, I promise you that.

    She sounds like kind of a bitch anyway, if she's outright telling you this guy is better than you. If it were me, I'd cut it off now, but it's not.

    • She is not a bitch, and she didn't tell me that. I assumed it, because it's true. Maybe you're right, but I've been on some difficult times and she makes me happy and feel good with myself, it's that I guess I'm not ready and confident enough to know she has a crush on another guy.

    • Well, I misunderstood that part. My bad.

      It's great that she helps you feel good, man, but I stand by my initial impression that telling you she has a crush on another guy is a weird move that's bad for a relationship.

  • dude, i can't believe you take that shit haha! stop being a bitch
    and break up with her!

    dude i get it, you love her, doesn't sound like she really gives a fuck about you, move on

  • You're going to get your heart broken either way. You leave her. If she does care about you she'll stop seeing him and try to get you back.