Do I ask her again? Or go to our mutual friend?

Recently downloaded Tinder. Yes, I'm aware it's generally a "hook up" app, but I choose not to use it that way. I've gone on a handful of dates, and it's been pleasant. Early on, I swiped on someone who I immediately recognized through a mutual friend's Facebook. I recognized her because we had comment threads and tagged photos together, though we've never met. She is a video game designer, nerd, down to earth mother of a three year old, and in her spare time she's a professional model. Honestly, she's a legitimate 10 in my book, and I thought she'd never swipe me. Five days ago...she matched me. My jaw dropped. I though I was dreaming. I was so blown away, I actually talked with our mutual friend about it, and her reaction was that she hopes for the best.

I struck up a conversation, and we've been talking every day a bit. She's not on often (it shows the timestamp for the uninitiated), and I know she's not talking to many guys. She doesn't really ask me questions, but she always amiably answers mine. I've complimented her and her son, but she doesn't really respond to that. I figure she's likely getting a ton of "hey gurl"s and "dtf?"s, so by just being myself I'm immediately different. I treat people like they should be treated.

So our conversation has been slow but at least we're talking. Yesterday, she posted a picture of her and her son at the zoo. We chatted briefly about her day, and I asked what her son's favorite animal was. After she told me, I asked what her favorite was, and then I asked her if she'd like to get together and talk more over dinner or a coffee. She responds to what her favorite animal is, but not to the other more important question. It's been a while now, and I know she saw it. I'm feeling really at a loss right now...why respond at all if you don't want to date? Do I ask again? Do I talk to the mutual friend? I really want to at least meet her and see where things go...she's beyond amazing...and I just want to get to know her more.
Also, I'm quite aware that I'm not entitled to anything, and that I can't make someone do anything. It's just that it's Tinder, and we matched, which means at some point there has been a mutual agreement to "like" one another. It's been my experience that if you don't want to go out with someone on there, you just ignore them altogether. I'm not sure why she'd answer my question, but not the other is all.


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  • goin to the mutual friend is always teh best choice in my opinion


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