EXCLUDING SEXUAL COMPATIBILITY, what do you consider most important in keeping a relationship strong, happy, and fulfilling?
What Guys Said 19
Communication easily. I seriously cringe at how I've talked with girls and they've talked about all these things that they've done to overly complicate their situations. One the other day told me how she was deliberately waiting days to text a guy because it apparently was some sort of rule and when I said "what rule?" she actually got frustrated. I know myself that I'd never pull those silly childish games.1
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I could help you with that since im in a long distance, which means absolutely nothing sexual, for a while :D
Well, there are some factors that have been said by everyone over a million times. Honesty. Its insanely important, if s/he is honest, you could believe everything, even when they tell you the most unrealistic thing. I've been in a strong long distance relationship with my girlfriend for 6 months, yes we fight but we work it out (3-5 times so far, impressive, right?). Don't discuss your problems with others. They will give you suggestions that you have to live with. They're just giving advice, because its easy to talk and comes with no responsibility for them.
Always remember the small things. yes, big things are major but without the small things it won't survive. Small things that I've done for my gf so far (some of them):
Send her flowers on our monthly anniversary (even tho we live 10,500 km apart)
made her a video for her birthday, collected them from 9 of her favorite people (9 is her favorite number, another small detail)
send her cute quotes at least 3 times a week
send her songs, funny videos
talk at least 2 hours a day (3 hours on average)
send cute msgs every here and then
the list goes on but you get the point. So little things matter.
Feeling cared about. If you care about your partner but won't show it, its almost worthless. My girlfriend is crazy about me, but didn't show it much which was really hurtful for awhile, until I gave her time and she became comfortable. You have to invest your time. Really invest it. Listen, a lot!
Find about your partners favorite things, and surprise him/her once in awhile. Surprises are awesome!
I'm a car enthusiast (petrolhead), and she always send me pictures of cars. Do you know how great that makes me feel? So you have to see what your partner cares about, and then you have to care about it too.
I'm limited to the characters here, but if you like to hear more, shoot me a message :)
best of luck1
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Do you get along with this person. Do you enjoy yourself around them. If you wouldn't be friends with this person if you never started a relationship, it probably won't work out1
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What Girls Said 7
I think for my own relationships, definitely open and comfortable communication, which involves an environment in which the two can be honest about their feelings without an excessive defensiveness from the other person in sensitive times. Good conversation in general, from the silly to the serious topics. Shared values and aligned beliefs, politically and in terms of "spiritual" faiths, or in my case, lack thereof. Warmth and affectionate, in our words and physical interaction. I like kisses, cuddling, hugs, and mild PDA. Some shared interests as well, and perspectives. And a comfort with independence in our social lives. No possessiveness or jealousy when I go on trips. And that gets to another key aspect - trust. Without trust, its all a giant shit show and race to the end anyway.1
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Being 100% honest with each other and 100% comfortable. Meaning you can look extremely stupid and goofy and the other person doesn't mind. Also finds it cute and fun. So where you don't feel like you have to hide anything. Like you can tell them the most embarrassing thing about you and it be not a big deal.0
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