Is it unrealistic of me to fall for a guy I've met online?

I know a lot about him, but I don't know everything. I think I'm falling for him but there are a lot of factors that would make any sort of real relationship unrealistic.
what should I do? I've never met anyone like him before and he just sees me in a way that no one has ever seen me before. He notices me, and not through things I directly tell him about myself but through observation. He makes me feel special, he accepts me and we have a lot in common but we're just friends.
What should I do?
Even if nothing ends up happening, should I even tell him that I like him or would it scare him off?
I wouldn't want to risk our friendship.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you should give it a shot. Maybe he will be your one true love. He sounds like a great guy. I don't think its unrealistic. Ask him to come visit you. I think you should be straight forward with him and tell him your feelings. I think he shares the same feelings he obviously makes you feel special that's important. Try it and if things are great. Maybe he would move. I know I would for the right girl.

    • Aww thanks! This was really encouraging :)
      Well, I think I'll just see how it goes for now.

    • Show All
    • Okay! Well... that might take a while. I need some time to figure out how to phrase it correctly.

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What Guys Said 7

  • its definitely not unrealistic, considering it happens to a lot of people, but does it usually work out? ehhh... im not too sure actually, i've heard success stories but I've heard more creepy stories. basically what you should consider is don't commit to anything without meeting him in person, don't fall in love with him until you meet him and get to genuinely know him. people can/are fake as fuck on the internet. there's even a really good documentary about fake people on the internet.

    • Thanks for the advice! Do you know the name of the documentary?

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    • Yeah... but then again, that was through sexting... which is way more sketchy. I'm not sure how likely this is.

    • ill bet its not likely your scenario, but its decent to raise awareness.

  • Of course it's not unrealistic , it is the 21st century after all but do bare in mind... the internet is only here to give you directions , after the sail headings is charted , it's time to put the plans into motions.

    Best of luck eh?

    Also... scare him off?
    With what? Your sabertoothed jaws and razor sharp caws? No worriesssss maaaateeee

    • DUDE! You cut your hair some more! ?

    • Show All
    • @Ihav2fart
      Yeah lol , I tried geling my hair Joseph Gordon Levit style for one day but with hair gel on I can't scratch my head if it itches so I went MEH... I'll shave it marines style.


      Okay... I'll admit it... I SCREWED UP! I screwed up BAD! I used a 5 guard thinking it would just be a trim but as soon as I start on my front... it was like a fucking thunderstorm of hair and I was like... oh shit...

    • lol must be an easily startled guy eh?
      Tho well , like I always said.
      There's no 2nd chance in life except to feel remorse.

  • It's complicated. Falling for someone online can happen, I wouldn't recommend starting a relationship though. They're always harder, require more trust from both people and there's no personal contact. Personally I wouldn't do it online, never (unless I already had a relationship with the girl before and had to continue it long distance because a lot of factors).

    So, I suggest you to think about what you want for yourself. Maybe it's better to try to keep your feelings for yourself and move on. If you're sure you're in love though, you can do something you want.

    • This is good advice, thanks! I think sadly I'm going to have to move on and try to get over it... there's just too many obstacles and like you said, it requires a lot of trust from both sides.

    • It's hard, but apparently it needs to be done. Good luck moving on ;)

    • Thanks :(

  • It happens to a lot of people. I've heard of stories where guy and girl eventually meet and get married.

    • Really? That's what someone else just told me. That's really nice, if it's true!

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    • I hope it works for you too! πŸ˜€

    • Thank you so much! :)

  • Tell him that you like him at least he'll know that n won't try to hurt you being a genuine guy😊 n it's nothing bad in online relationship but is he far from you?

    • But, I'm afraid of the consequences of telling him. Either he won't like me back and I'll be a bit crushed and it might make things awkward between us... or he will, and then our relationship will be hindered by distance. Yes, he's far from me.

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    • I think so :(

    • Tell him about your feelings at least

  • I love you too

  • Speaking as someone in the exact same situation? Take things slow. Build trust. Verify what you can - there are romance scammers out there, and worse. For the paranoid, there exist PI firms like Wymoo which can run background checks to confirm this person's identity. You don't necessarily need to go that far, but in any case, be sure to keep people in your life "in the loop" in regards to what's happening between you, especially if and when you plan to meet in person.

    That last part is no joke:

    Choose video chat over texting as much as possible - a lot of meaning in human communication is conveyed through things like body language and tone of voice; things which text and IM don't convey. There will be a natural tendency to fill the gaps in your interaction with fantasy that you'll have to keep in check - that longing can translate into great passion if everything is legitimate between you two, but bear in mind you won't know anything for sure until you've met and spent time together in person. Again, take things slow, and make sure you're both on the same page.

    Now that all the boilerplate warnings are out of the way, have fun with it. Communicate, get to know each other. Think of creative ways to keep your interaction fresh. For instance, you could exchange recipies and walk each other through cooking them during a Skype session.

    This could be the best thing that ever happened for you. It has been a very good experience for me. Just be sure you're safe and smart about it.

    • Wow, thanks! I appreciate all the warnings! I'm all about safety first anyways. I'm glad to hear that it's been a good experience for you. Do you mind sharing a bit more about it? Like how you transitioned from texting to skyping and made your friendship into a real relationship.

What Girls Said 1

  • If you haven't met him before it's definitely not realistic... the perception of him online is different to when you meet someone in person, just entirely different... id slow yourself down, meet him first some where in public and spend time with him and see what you think, don't get roped into the whole virual world. I've been on dates with a guy guys i met online, only 1 did i ever fancy the socks off of but he turned out he cheats on girls and loves to have a piece on the side...

    • Thanks for the advice :)

    • No probs, you just don't knwo who he is,. anyone can say anything they want and be anyone they want on the internet so always meet them in person and get to know them, i've found most of the guys i met i found them attractive online then soon as i met them i had immediate second thoughts, just seeing them, hearing their voice, observing who they are etc... is so different.

    • Yes, that's very true.

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