So she acted like she liked me, now I am pushing things? Am I friendzoned?

So I met this girl about 3 weeks ago as she took a job at the place I worm, I thought she was pretty, funny, etc. pretty much from the start. I had no intentions of making a move on her though, at least not yet, she was just a co-worker. But then my friends piled on her putting in "good words for me" and stuff, like five of them. I decided now I had to act or shed think I was a creep. So I got her number and she agreed to hang out. Great. Then she texted me A LOT, saying flirty stuff and I figured well this is cool. I invited her to go to the gym with me and she said "Id love to." Then she said "Well then you'd see me all sweaty and gross, so maybe not."

Fast forward to yesterday, we were supposed to hang out, but then she said "Oh my Aunt needs me I can't, so maybe another day hun." Then, later on, she says "Hey I get the feeling we have different motives... I am not looking for a BF right now, I just moved here and stuff, kinda chaotic and I am not ready to jump into that right now. You didn't do anything to me, I am just overwhelmed a little. We will still talk, I dont know about hanging out right now but maybe, we will figure it all out shortly."

I have been friendzoned, and I have been able to diagnose the how and why everytims, it is almost always my fault. This time I got nothing, no where I can see "big mistake there" or "She is showing friendzone signs here." Nothing. It's like a light switch flipped in her head and now I am friendzoned. Unless I am overreacting, this screams "Well it's not you, it is me." And actually, it screams "You are so friendzoned because u didn't meet BF material for me but I am being nice" kinda thing.

I think I played my cards well. Somehow I lost. Unless she actually does like me but is afraid to commit because of her situation.


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  • Just don't bother with it, don't worry about being friend zoned and don't try so hard. Right now she says, "I have diffwrent motives so leave it as that and don't try to pursue as if she is hiding other feelings like she likes you or anything.
    when she said some other time you should have made a definite date. Now you can't know unless you keep bugging her for a hang out which will drive her nuts. My best advice is to just stop contacting her until she wonders about you. You make yourself less available then she will wonder why or if you have lost interest. Then also tone down your obvious interest toward her. Make her more interested in you instead of you being more interested in her.


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