Tinder Dating Question?

Been talking to this guy for a little under month.. He claims to be shyish, tbh I believe him. He's only initated conversation once, but I really like him. He quite the catch.. He's never mentioned anything about possibly meeting up, granted its only been a month. Should I take the initative? It'd be nice to see mutual attraction.. But idk!!
Is it a turnoff if a girl takes initiative? Will it look desperate? :-(

Thanks everyone for the reconfirmation!! I'm gonna go for it!!! :-)


Most Helpful Guy

  • I take it he's quite good looking?

    • Anyway a month seems like fair while to just be talking to someone, I think it makes sense to meet up after you've been talking a while. If you want to meet then just ask him.

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    • That's surprising then, I thought he must have been given you've had to initiate all the conversations. I mean girls are generally inundated with contact through online dating so I thought must have stood out for you to be so keen when he's so shy.

      Anyway I see nothing wrong in a girl asking a guy to meet up.

    • He's kinda dorky looking lol, but I think the conversation and playfulness really attracted me to him. I've initiate the majority of the tinder convos.. Unless they beat me to it!

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • I have used Tinder and POF for 99% of my dating since my divorce. I think both work well. but why would you be chatting for a month without going out? I once chatted with someone for over 2 weeks before we could get a free day to meet. it didn't go further then the 1 date. I will chat with someone for 1-3 days depending on how much I am chatting. If it is a few hours a night then 1 or 2 days then i ask her to meet. if it is just a few texts here and there, then say 3 days. but you should meet sooner rather then later. Until you know if there is any chemistry it is pointless. I have had a number of women where, on paper, we were the perfect match. but in person it just didn't work out.

    • That's an interesting thought.. Is a month really too long? We are both busy people with demanding schedules. I eventually gave him my number and we are planning to meet up, though I'm nervous now because well he is a tinder guy after all lol. But then I guess I'm a tinder girl? Haha nowadays you really can't trust people... So meeting up too quickly can be dangerous

    • If you start dating your going to have to see each other a lot more then 1x a month. so if you don't have a couple of hours to meet for drinks, you don't have time to date.

  • It's not a turnoff to me. I really respect it, because I know it takes guts. And I don't think it will look desperate.

  • Do it. Guys love it when women take the initiative.


What Girls Said 1

  • It's good that you take initiative. Some guys don't mind and like it and some don't. But it's good to try anyway. You should if you really like him.

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