Most Helpful Girl
"i know it's a bit of a stretch to want these girls to not be shallow when i'm being pretty shallow myself, but surely there must be a way?"
You can't expect something from other people that you don't also deliver. Why is it so important to you to get a "hot" girlfriend? Honestly, even if you manage to get a "hot" girlfriend who's way out of your league, it's very unlikely to work out anyways because you'll probably feel really insecure and therefore jealous and controlling..
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Most Helpful Guy
"the kind of girls i want to bag are out of my league"... don't we all? lol
Your biggest problem, and this will sound really cliche, is that you're not even viewing them as girls or people... but as "hot girls". The girls that let the competition come to them and they choose between them are already going to beat you out. The reason being is they aren't as desperate looking to get that notch on their bedpost (even if they are).
And the "hot girls" that want to be taken seriously won't give you the time of day because you don't even seem interested in getting to know who they are. The reasoning is that to you, their looks are enough and that's all you need.
So your biggest obstacle, excluding whatever insecurities and issues you have to address, is that you have this very vague idea of what you want. You want a hot girl... what else? Can she be a shithead? A druggie? A girl looking for a sugar daddy? A girl with a strong attitude? A sweet girl? A girl you can stand to be around?
Do you present yourself well? Do you make an effort to look attractive? Do you workout to improve and sculpt your body? Are you fun and charming to talk to? Do you let your insecurities ruin your own chances?