Girls, I became involved with a friend recently and am unsure of what to do. I can't stop thinking about her?

I am a senior graduating college next week. Freshman year, I asked this beautiful girl I knew to my fraternity formal. Instead of calling/texting, I opted to ask her to lunch and do it in person. She couldn't go, but I guess she was flattered. Must have made a great impression. We've been friends ever since. She had a bf for a long time, and was with someone for most of this year, but we clicked. She would always remind me of, "that time we went to lunch." I invited her to a bar tab about two months back. We hooked up and she slept over. Didn't think much of it at the time, as we're almost done, but I wanted to see where it would lead.

A few weeks later, I found out that my grandfather was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I texted Sam after talking with my mom (not about my situation). She got back the next morning saying that her own grandpa passed away. We received our news at literally the same time. So weird. We consoled/comforted one another. After that, things became more emotional. Everything was great until about a week and a half ago when I took her to my date party. She seemed really anxious and cold, not like her at all. I walked her home and it continued when I saw her next. I texted her (probably a mistake, but whatever) the next day asking what's up. Did I come on too strong? She replied, "Idk i guess it kinda scared me. I had just gotten out of a relationship. And we are also about to leave school," adding, "idk I just don't want anything serious." Made sense and is understandable. I will likely be attending law school in Chicago in the fall, and she will be about 90 min away. I'll admit that the thought of it continuing crossed my mind, especially after the (albeit unfortunate) coincidence with our grandfathers and subsequent convo. We haven't spoken or seen each other since the aforementioned text. She's definitely not mad about anything, nor would I manipulate her. I just want to tell her how I feel and know where I stand. Bad idea? Suggestions?


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  • I think you're on the right path.. just tell her exactly what you feel.. the truth almost always gets through.. she might be overwhelmed at first and she might be backing away bc she thinks your relationship won't work bc it would be a long commute. regardless of her reaction, you should let her know your feelings bc you'll probably regret it otherwise


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