I see a lot of posts asking "how can I ask her/him to hang out without her/him knowing I like her/him" or something along those lines. Why don't they want their love interest to know how they feel? I get that it could seem embarrassing if they ask and get shot down, but is there some other reason for it?
Why do people try to be subtle about their feelings?
Most Helpful Girl
Well as far as just like, "Hey I like you let's go on a date", I'm okay with this and if I get a no it is because they are seeing someone. Men don't often say no if they aren't unless the woman is way unattractive.
I've had to learn the hard way more than once why me as the woman making the initial effort is a high risk venture.
Most men will jump at the opportunity to date a women having put in zero effort so it is more likely that there level of interest in actually dating you is lower than the man who worked for weeks to finally screw up the nerve to ask you for a drink.
Second maybe he did like you and was screwing up the nerve but hadn't yet. He isn't sure if he is good enough or whatever and running all these different scenarios and is suddenly shocked when you are the one 'chasing' approaching him. This can (but not always) result in him feeling like maybe he overvalued you market value or cause him to just get lazy because the cat is in the bag.
This is by no means always the case and one could argue a confident man wouldn't react in these manners, that these are the men one wouldn't want anyways. I know I sure did for a long time. I'll make it as easy as I can for a guy to know it is okay to ask me but I don't do the asking anymore and that was a hard pill to swallow but for the better.
Now feelings like "I love you"? Whole different ball of wax. LOL best0