Should I give him a chance?

I'll try to make this description short and simple (but I do tend to rant, sorry). There's this guy who asked me to prom (as friends) but it was clearly a "more than friends" gesture. He asked in a very cute way which showed that he spend time and effort into the idea and then at prom we awkwardly slow danced together but we never really talked. In person he is very awkward and it feels like he's scared of me... which I think he's just nervous. We've been texting a lot more lately and our conversations are okay and we have some basic personality traits and interests in common. Everyone says I should give this guy a chance and eventually go out with him, but I'm just not sure. I think maybe I could give him a shot and see how it works out but I don't want to hurt him in the long run. He probably wouldn't ask me out until after exams (if he were to do something) but I'm not sure what I should say. I've been in a relationship before where I thought I like the guy until we started dating and then I realized he wasn't the same so I feel like if I were to give this guy a chance then we should probably get to know each other as friends before anything progresses. I just don't know what to do and I don't want there to be any stupid high school drama out of this whole situation.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Very short and simple? If you don't feel any chemistry with him now, time wouldn't necessarily change that. You can give him a chance, but like you said, he'll probably get hurt in the long run.

    • That's what I was thinking. We both have mutual friends who are trying to get the two of us together but I don't think the chemistry is there. Even at prom we would sit at the table and awkwardly not say anything to each other for at least a few minutes at a time.

    • Show All
    • You are overthinking this

    • Yup, sorry about that. Thank you so much for your insight

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What Guys Said 4

  • This sounded almost exactly like my situation... Everything really... I say go with whatever your gut instinct is, it normally will lead you right. One warning though, just because you don't become more than friends doesn't mean you still can't lose your friendship. Me and the girl in my situation never got into a relationship, I just don't think she was interested.. But it got to be very painful for me and so we drifted apart and now we never talk to each other really... Which hurts as well.. You just have to play everything right no matter which path you decide to take.

    • The thing is, we're not even really friends to begin with. I feel awful for saying that because he seems like a nice guy and I've known him since the 2nd grade, but I've never seen him in that light. We both have mutual friends who are trying to put us together but I can't see it working out. It's like putting a puzzle piece where it doesn't fit. I don't know if that made sense?

    • @asker

      It makes sense, but friendship to one person means something completely different to what another person sees. This isn't helping you I realize, but he might see you as friends even if, well, you aren't.

    • I'm pretty sure he now sees us as friends (or at least beginning to be friends) after prom. He keeps texting me and since I don't want to seem rude, I respond. Sometimes I'll be engaged in the conversation and other times I'll only respond with one or two word messages. Sure, this may send mixed signals, but I don't send any type of smiley face or anything that could be mistakenly taken as "flirty".

  • No. Give him a tampon.

  • No you shouldn't.

    • Any particular reason why I shouldn't?

  • Yes give him a chance

    • Any particular reason why I should?

What Girls Said 1

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