Have you ever been so hurt you couldn't even identify the emotions you were feeling but you could feel every single last one of them?

long story short I liked a guy who had a mean girlfriend, I wanted him so bad I let my wants get the best of me, I lost my integrity and morals and befriended him lying to myself that my feelings wouldn't grow, my feelings grew, he lead me on for 5 months flirting texting etc (nothing physical) all of a sudden he completely cut me out of his life, his girlfriend told him to never speak to me again and so he listened etc and now I feel this..
I feel horrible that I intentionally tried to wreck someone's relationship because I would never want anyone to so that to me, I feel horrible that I can't have him, I feel horrible that I still want him, I feel horrible that we aren't even friends anymore and I feel horrible because everything that happened is all my fault. And now?
Now I can't sleep, I try to eat but I do t have ana appetite and I can't taste food at. All, food just feels like matter in my mouth and there is an unsettling feeling in my stomach all the time, when I speak my voice shakes, my heart skips, I'm cold on the inside but hot to touch, and I feel like everything in me has just been drained. It feels like someone threw a Tv and hit me in the head and im just waking up from a coma and everything seems like a faded memory. Like I just want to lay down like a dog and surrender to life... What are these feelings that I'm feeling? I don't know what to call this

And if its any consolation I'm Sorry.


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What Girls Said 1

  • It's your first real heart break. I remember when I had my first one. I cried for weeks every single day, felt numb, didn't want to go anywhere or talk to anyone. I felt like I wasn't living I was just existing if that makes sense. With time it will get better. Try to get out and do things you enjoy. Keep yourself preoccupied so you won't think about this. Eventually you will feel better

    • Do I have the right to feel a heart break if he was never mines and I tried to steal him? Don t I deserve this?

    • You have every right to feel it. Nobody can tell you how you should feel. No matter what you really liked him and in the end you lost him. You will go through those emotions but you will be fine trust me

    • Also you need to try to forgive yourself and move on. We have all done some stupid stuff for love. Life is a learning lesson. Don't be too hard on yourself.

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