How to dump a long time boyfriend who has no friends (Tried 3 times already)?

Each time I dump him I always end up taking him back because he ends up doing the its the end of the world type of ordeal. He says im the only one he has in his life and he has no friends and his family doesn't really care about him.

I feel really bad and dont want to do it but I really can't go on with him anymore.

We been together for a long time so I feel I should do it in person but then that happens when i am there in person.
  • Do it in person and run away right away
    Vote A
  • Do it by email
    Vote B
  • Do it on video chat
    Vote C
  • Other Idea (Put in opinion)
    Vote D
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Most Helpful Guy

  • How does a chronic alcoholic stops drinking

    Day by day reducing the amount of alcohol.
    In the same way, stay away from him. Like 5 texts today,4 tomorrow,2 the next day.


Most Helpful Girl

  • He's manipulating you. You've already tried many times to break up, so send an email saying that you wish no further contact, that way it's in writing so if you need to prove it to the police it's there, showing that you told him, in case things escalate to harassment. If you tell him in person, he pulls at your emotions and knows he can get to you. Don't give him this power.

    What he's doing is borderline abusive, if it's not already, but only you might know. He has no friends for a reason, and to lose you means he's lost one thing he feels he is controlling. That's why I say it's abuse since he's manipulating you.

    You owe him nothing more than an email saying goodbye, and I know it will be hard at first, but after that, you must practice the art of ignoring.

    I had to do this with my ex who was boorish and mean to everyone, including me, and no matter how I broke it off with him, I was apparently doing it wrong, or my timing was always wrong. I tried everything, seriously. To his face, in a text, in an email, I was nice, I got mad, I was stern.. you name it, I tried everything and it was always the same song and dance. Finally I went to the police and they suggested an email. I did this to prove I was telling him to leave me alone. From that point, I've had to ignore everything he's done, trying tactics to make me call him. Slowly it stopped, but even today, he finds some way to try and play nice guy to make an excuse to make a profile on Facebook to write to me. (I've blocked him otherwise.) He was abusive. Recognize the signs. Like I said, there is a reason guys like this have no friends and people seem to hate them. They know this, and try to manipulate their girlfriends to have some sort of control, and become asshats when they feel that control slipping away. Get out of this fast and with some proof, and do NOT contact him once it's done no matter what.

    Good luck! :)


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Look at it this way. You can break it off now. Or you can break it off when you are 80 and bitter because you missed because of him the opportunity to be with the person you really wanted to be with

    Break it off in person, don't give in to emotional blackmail and be strong. You will be fine and so will he.

  • Just do it in person and leave him to get on with it, if he wants to curl up and die in the corner because the relationship ended then that's up to him. lol


What Girls Said 4

  • Do it in person and give him the respect he deserves. If you've been with him so long then it's mutually respectful and kind to break it off and leave when you can, not run right out the door. Rip off the bandaid and allow him to be sad, answer his questions, then leave. I dated a man once for only three months or so and I felt that he deserved a face to face break up. I said my piece, he asked a few questions about it, then we parted on good terms. It doesn't matter if he has no friends or not, as someone you spent a lot of time with he deserves an in person break up. And don't just escape out the door the instant you do. At least give him a few minutes to process lol

  • Face to face is probably the best. Explain to him that you love him as a friend (only if you still care about him) tell him that you're gonna stay in his life and still be his FRIEND (only if you want to stay in touch and be friends of course) but that your relationship just doesn't work anymore. I understand that it feels like an end of the world for him. Everyone wants to be loved and cared for. I've had a time in my life when I had no friends and the loneliness and the feeling of not mattering is horrible. Do you have any idea why he doesn't have any friends?

  • Do it in person and tell him that you are not going to take him back no matter what. Muster up the courage and do it.

  • Do it on the phone or something. Unless you know for sure in a frustrating situation like that he wouldn't do any harm to you. Just ignore anuyhing he said. My best friend was in that position but she ended up getting married and she regrets why she was not strong enough to break up with him, now they're getting a divorce.


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