Been going out with a guy, but he is silent and doesn't talk a lot about himself. I feel worried that we can't connect to each other. What to do?

*I'm Brazilian, sorry for any mistakes*
Met this guy on Tinder. We talked a little on whatsapp, he was always a person of few words, but kept pursuing me. We went out together three times. At the first date, we went to a coffee shop and talked a little. I spoke more than him, naturally. He walked me home and we hugged tightly. When I arrived home, there was a message on whatsapp, from him, saying "your hug is very warm and good, just for your information". We kept in touch with vague regularity, he asked me out the day after, but I was busy. Some days later (and during these days we texted now and then via whatsapp, he dropped hints that he wanted to see me, but I was really busy) I asked him out again. We went to a park near the beach. This date was awesome, we kissed for the first time and the physical contact didn't cease during all day. We talked about a lot of things, but there were lots of moments of silence too. Then, he disappeared from whatsapp and I became crazy, but then understood he needed some space. We tried to get together again two times, but we had some trouble with our schedules. Twenty days after the last date, we've gone to the movies yesterday and it was great. Lots of cuddling, kissing and some mild make out. But this is what bothers me: the silence. I feel like he won't tell me a thing if I don't ask, and sometimes it's tiring to do this. I even ask him if he is finding something boring, but he says no, and says he's enjoying it. Now, after the third date, silence is really worrying me, because I'm getting attached physically, I want to get to know him more, but don't feel like he's open for this. On the other hand, he doesn't act with me like he only wants a hook up. I mean, chemistry is great, but I really want to get into his world, his fears, his conquers. If I ask, he will probably tell me those things, but I feel disencouraged to do all the work by myself. Don't know if it's worth all the effort. What to do?
A friend who dated him a long time ago said he was silent around her too. So, maybe it's normal.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You love him?
    Or you just like him or you want him as a friend?

    • We're seeing each other and we get along well. I'm not in love with him, but don't want to keep things superficial. We had three dates and I feel that I still know few things about him...

    • Show All
    • He asked me out, but every date he tried to plan went wrong due to work and time issues.

    • So let's say ignore him for a week
      Then he'll care about this between you two

Most Helpful Girl

  • Hmm well he's either shy, trying to be mysterious, or you make him nervous and he disent want to f*ck up... give him a little time:)


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What Guys Said 1

  • guess he needs some time in order to open up... he's a shy guy i guess... better remain with him... he just needs some time 8)


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