He likes to hurt me, is it playful or not?

He likes to bite me and grab my fingers and squeeze them really hard. He slowly applies more and more pressure until it hurts and I say OW. His response was typically, really that hurts? Then he wants me to squeeze him hard and thinks it's weird when I can't do it hard... kinda weird considering I'm a girl and if we're flirting isn't that attractive that he's stronger than me? I don't know why I just really like spending time with him. He doesn't do it as much and actually apologizes now. Should this still be considered a red flag? I always ask him why do you like doing this and he would just say you like it... weird.

Any and all advice welcome.


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What Girls Said 2

  • It appears here, dear, he is the sort of guy who loves pain and perhaps even rough sex as well. It's a Control thing and I believe you should yes... Consider it a Big red flag.
    If he has started to do this, just because he lessens his blow now, doesn't mean he won't pick it up in the future. He likes a challenge when he tells you to be tough with him, it may even be a turn on to him.
    Tell him you enjoy his company but to keep his hands off the tender merchandise. You also tell him you like the soft touch with a guy and he needs to Handle with Care, if he dare.
    Good luck. xx

  • i dont think it is just playful.

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