Are men in their 40's any more mature than in their youth re: dating?

Met a man online a couple of months ago, late 40's same as me, both divorced with children. He seemed very genuine. We kept in touch every day even if it was only a quick text or email. Saw each other maybe 4 times a week.

Then he suddenly starts acting jealous then offhand, not getting in touch at all for days on end. Very mixed messages (ignores me then takes me to visit his family!) and for the last week it's been me contacting him so I'm going to leave it at that now.

If he doesn't get back in touch, he either has just lost interest or has better things to do. I *know* this is really common behavior for young men, but I didn't expect it of someone his age. He told my teenage son to play hard to get with women a while back but if this is what he is doing with me, it's a complete turn off! Any opinions?


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Age has nothing to do with maturity, despite what some other girls believe. Life experiences and upbringing is far more important to test maturity, than age. So this man, obviously your seeing why he's divorced. If I were you, I'd find another male, with less baggage and issues.

    • If only it were that easy... Must admit, it did concern me when we first met and he told me he'd always been dumped by women! I think perhaps what he meant was he always behaves like this and then just *tells* people he's been dumped... I let him get away with behaving badly for a while as I know he has other troubles, but I think he's just too self involved to consider how his behaviour affects others. He's a good man at heart, just very childish I think and age isn't improving that... Thanks.

What Girls Said 1

  • Well don't men to go through that mid life crisis at that age? Tht alone tells me that men don't mature, I think you reach a level of maturity at about 25 and if they're still a little boy then, they'll always be a little boy.

    These things depend on the guy really, but some women never mature either.

    I mean my Dad's girlfriend is pathetic, she's in her 50ies and my Dad treats her like crap, I've asked her multiple times why she lives with him and she says because my dad is her friend and he's a good guy deep down. I've told her Several times he's an evil bastard, always has been always will be, you'd think at her age she's want respect in a relationship, someone to enjoy growing old with but no... it's really rather sad. I recently learned her ex husband, who is dead now so she didn't leave him, was a raving alcholic and beat her. What a sad sad case.

    • I agree about the age 25, I was fully matured by then and have changed little since, just dealt with a lot of issues in my life and have come out the other side. Some people can just never resolve their issues I guess and spend the rest of their lives projecting stuff onto other people. This man isn't an evil bastard, but he's shown me no respect lately and I won't allow that, I'm worth better. He seems to have massive self esteem issues but I don't, thank goodness. Thanks...