Dating a woman with emotional baggage.

I suppose you could say I haven't had the easiest life. I was raped when I was 17 and I haven't had the best of relationships since. But this past February I got pregnant by my boyfriend at the time. I found out he was cheating on me so I broke it off. I had enough of that in the past. Then found out I was pregnant. he said he wanted to be there for the baby but had no feelings for me. Which I understood. But he was never there to come to the appointments or anything. Oct 21st My son was born. He was a stillborn. The doctors can't find any reason why his heart stopped beating. I'm not looking for anyone now, or in the near future. But someday I will want to be with someone, who I love and who truly loves me back. My question is, will I ever find someone like that? I know most men don't like women with emotional baggage. Its not like I'm going to bring up these things on a first date but eventually they will come up and he will have to decide if he can handle it and lets be honest, most men will run. Basically my question is how many men with that affect? Will I ever be able to find a person who loves me even through everything I've been through?

At this point I don't know who to give the best answer to both are great! Thanks so much guys. I just needed to know there was hope for love in my future.


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What Guys Said 2

  • These things that have happened to you are horrible, but they aren't your fault. And the feelings that have resulted from these situations, also not your fault. The only thing anyone can fault you with, is not trying your damnedest to pick yourself back up and brush yourself off despite the many excuses you have not to. Easier said than done though, obviously. But any man who cannot sympathize with you for what you have gone through, and cannot cut you some slack as far as giving your wounds time to heal, can't really be called a man anyways, and isn't someone you'd want to spend the remainder of your days with, hopefully. I wouldn't judge anyone for their past, especially if I liked the person, because their past is part of the reason they are who they are currently, and as long as you were working to get yourself better, and were in a place in your life, ready to commit to someone and give them your all, neither I, or any man worth being with, won't give you plenty of chance to do so.

    • To the update: The only one who can take away your hope sweetheart, is you. Don't let your situation allow that to happen. It doesn't have to be bleak.

  • First I want to say that you have to realize that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you in any way. I have known plenty of guys that would never run from that if they really loved you. you need to know that if any guy runs from that and just ignores his feelings for you because of it then you do not want to be with him in any case.

    I have encountered several people (not just girls) that have been in a similar situation to the one that you are in. I know that none of those people can compare to the emotions that you are feeling in any way. because everyone is unique.

    i can tell you that I know hundreds of guys in a large range of ages that would not run away from you but would actually sympathize and try their best to be empathetic.

    Don't give up hope yet :)


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