Guy I'm seeing is so sweet, but he doesn't show his affection when we're with friends?

I'm dating this guy (we're going on our third date soon) and I know for sure he is really into me. He talks about me all the time to his friends & family, he sends me very sweet messages, he remembers all kinds of things about me, today he bought me a little present. I like him a lot.

But it really hurts my feelings when we hang out in a group with our other friends. He does talk to me but struggles to make eye contact with me (he doesn't have this problem with anyone else).

He often makes the effort to sit next to me and will say quite intimate things to me when we are side by side. And he once openly said to the group that he couldn't believe we were dating because I was 'out of his league.'

But often... he seems to ignore me. I'm quite shy so this might be part of the problem. So the other night I had a bit to drink, and I purposely sat beside him, so that we could talk. and we were talking. But he got distracted while I was talking to him (I wasn't talking too much or anything) and started listening to another (really pretty) girl on the other side of him who was telling a funny story... It really hurt my feelings. Maybe I was over-reacting?

The worst thing is he flirts really obviously with like every girl but me. It leaves feeling very hurt and like he doesn't like me.

But then as soon as we are on our own again, he gets all nervous and sweet and I see he does really like me.

The only thing I know that might explain it is that he tells me he finds me extremely intimidating (his hands were even shaking on our first date). But still... I mean we've been on three dates, I wish he could show more obviously he likes me when we're with other people :(

Why is he doing this? And how can I fix the situation so it's easier in a group? Should I just ignore him back in these situations?

Oops... I meant we are going on our fourth date soon :)


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  • he obviously feels you should socialise as a group. he wants you in private. this is not unusual!