How long do I await reply?

I asked my coworker and friend "Sara" out today. She started an hour before me so I came in 10 minutes before my shift. When I came over she asked what was up and I said "I just came in here to ask if I can buy you a drink next week". She didn't seem surprised, just smiled and said she'd get back to me once she looked at her schedule, and knew a day, cause she's busy a lot (working 3 jobs). I told her she knows how to reach me. She did work a 12 hour day today, so I understand she's tired, and it may not be tonight she replies.

how long should I wait before it is appropriate to message her?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Wait around a week or so.

    • A week, wow. But within that time I'd see her at work. What if I texted her today or tomorrow with a day and place idea?

    • Well, she just called me and said "I said I would get back to you because I was honestly a little taken aback you asked me out for a drink. I think though I'd rather have you as a friend". :(

      Oh well, such is life. Thanks for advice!

    • I am sorry about that.

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 1

  • Ok, firstly, if she was into you, she'd have offered another day. You didn't suggest a day. Hmmm. Bad form. I think the fact that she wasn't enthusiastic means that she doesn't like you.

    You left all kinds of plausibility on why she can blow you off. They think it spares your poor little feelings if you think that the reason she's not meeting you for drinks is because she's busy.

    So you gotta play it cool. Wait a week. At least.

    Why didn't you flirt with her while on the clock?

    • Crap. Yeah, I had a day/place planned but the other part of that is initially we were interrupted by another coworker and I had to make a BS story about needing keys to get in the back, before returning to Sara. She is working in a different area than me. then she was going to have somebody else coming up to her in a minute, so I just had to say "I lied to her, I didn't need keys. I came over to ask you out for a drink next week." it seemed succinct in the moment

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    • when you use that kind of language, suddenly I don't put as much stock into what you have to say

    • And I thought waiting was the right move anyway, but to a point

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