Why didn't she accept my gift on the first date?

So this girl and I were talking for over 2 weeks before we met. We finally went for a walk and we got along great. I hugged her and opened my door for her and treated her like a lady. We conversed back and forth and she was digging me. She asked me tons of questions and she remembered all the little things. I bought her a book that was perfect for her but she didn't accept it and that has me worried but anyways the night ended by me walking her to her car and I hugged her and lightly kissed her on the lips then we parted ways. As we drove away and I passed her she gave me a cute wave and smile. She texted me 15 minutes later thanking me for the nice evening. We made plans for a 2nd date she couldn't make my first offer but it was set for next Friday. We texted back and forth that night until I told her goodnight. We don't text as much now and she's always online on her online profile so am I though lol. We still text lots just not as much. She's a shy polite woman. There's mixed signals here or am I worrying too much? Just the not accepting gift, the always online on her dating site, her not openly flirting, her texting me less all make me wonder if she's interested. Signs she is are the fact she kissed me, texted me immediately on her own thanking me for the evening, accepting a second date and liking posts and stuff on my Facebook. What do you guys think? Is she interested and shy and cautious it just leading me on?
Also if I say things like we should play Bideo games sometimes as she loves to play all she says is maybe and then says but I'm going to bed. You have a goodnight. Just shy?


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What Girls Said 1

  • She's not your girlfriend yet, and is still fishing around talking to guys. She's allowed to do that, unless she's made it clear she wants exclusivity between you. Otherwise, she's weighing out her online options and you should be prepared that she may choose you over all others because you were the winner, or she will choose someone else for what ever her reasons may be. Online dating is a horrible tool to use when you gauge where you two stand. There is too much ability to see who's online and if they're sending winks and gifts and what not. If you can't take it, you should really just try and meet a girl offline.

    She likely felt a bit of obligation for taking your gift, especially without really knowing you. Perhaps she felt that if she accepted it means she would feel pressure to give you something back or see you again when she's not prepared to, and didn't want it to come across as just using you and taking something you bought and running away with it. How would it seem if she took it and then started dating someone else? Most guys are jerks about stuff like that these days and piss and moan that they want their gift back if the girl doesn't start seeing them or breaks up with them.

    You're on such delicate ground right now with this girl that it's just impossible to tell until she gets off that site and makes it clear that she only wants to date you, or she's off the site and wants to date someone else.

    I think right now, she's acknowledging how soon things would progress and is carefully taking her time so as not to make a quick decision on what she wants to do. At this moment, she belongs to no one, you shared a date, she was polite enough to text you to thank you - sheesh not many people even do that! - so it sounds like she's so far a nice person and not to lose hope. If she denies seeing you again and isn't responding after nearly a week, forget it, and my suggestion is to meet someone the old fashioned way -- offline.

    • Awesome advice!! It was a great first date it really was. I've been on hundreds and ice never had one go this smooth and perfect. No awkward moments or anything! We went from 60 messages each to like 10 or so afterwards. She was busy for work and when the weekend came she texted me more. I hate texting to be honest I just hope she's slightly interested. I know she felt chemistry it was obvious unless she's just saying and doing everything right to get me hooked. M friend knows her and says she not that kind of girl and that she's perfect for me

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    • Ya I'm just scared because this girl is different from every other girl. There's something special about her and all theses games that people play now a days are irrelevant with her and she doesn't play them and it's all new to me. I'm out of my comfort zone. I'm used to the typical game playing and what not. She's totally worth it though. Thank you very much!!

    • You're welcome! Good luck :)

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