If you really like a guy but he tries to move faster than you're comfortable, how does that make you feel?

I have an (irrational?) fear of women rejecting my sexual advances (kissing, touching, making out). I've never had a woman "give me the cheek", and in fact I recently made out with a woman multiple different times on our first date. However I've only ever tried to kiss on 3 different dates, so I don't have a lot of experience.

Obviously I'm not going to force myself on a woman. I can tell when we're not making a connection and neither of us are wanting to kiss or go on another date. But what if the date is going really well? I have an (irrational?) fear that if I go too far or too fast for what she's comfortable with she'll not want to go out again.

Should I be okay as long as I use common sense, be aware of her reciprocating, and obviously respect if she says stop?

Ladies, if a guy does something your not comfortable with yet, is it a big deal as long as he respects your boundaries?

Is it better to be cautious or should I just be a man, kiss her and grab her ass if I want to, and unless she tells me to stop to not be worried about it?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would wait for her to make initial contact, like touching your arm and things like this. Wait until she is comfortable with you in her personal space before trying anything again.

    If a guy keeps trying to push for a kiss or whatever after I've tried to make it clear I'm not comfortable yet then it gets to the point where I just don't want to see him. It ruins to good time. That said if I'm not comfortable kissing the guy by the third date then there is obviously a miss somewhere so I probably won't date him past that. No point in leading him on.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Most of the time, if the date went well, girls will have no problem with you kissing them. If you start trying to go further (within reason), generally one of three things will happen:
    -she will be cool with it
    -she will be uncomfortable but will just go with it
    -she will politely stop you and say she's not ready, and if you have a nice reaction, this usually won't kill her attraction for you, as it's pretty typical guy behavior

    So there's nothing to really be scared of. Just use common sense and you'll be fine.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Well first off you have to understand if she's giving you that sexual vibe or not... then grab her ass and kiss her. See what happens after. She'll either slap you or reciprocatešŸ˜Š


What Guys Said 1

  • As long as you communicate with each other about the pace and boundaries you will be fine

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