We're highschool sweetheart. Been together for 7 years and engaged for 3 months. I was out of town for family emergency for the past 2 weeks. I came back 2 days ago and just today I found out on his phone that he sent a nude to another girl. I never know who this girl is so I confronted him about it. He later admitted that when I was out of town, this girl happened to add him on facebook. They started to talk and they met up once to go to movies. He said nothing happened between them they didn't even kiss. However, from reading their conversation, it wasn't just meeting once. At one part she was like "I don't like sleeping alone come overrrr" but he deleted his reponse so I don't know if he came over there overnight or not. He swear they didn't have sex or have any kind of physical contact in a sexual way, and that he only send that nude and that's all. What do I do now? Should I trust him? My heart is broking into pieces I've been with him for so long maybe I should forgive one time? Please help I'm devastated.
Most Helpful Guy
I was in the Navy. I spent months on end away from my family. And my Navy career was over 20 years. Never in that time did I cheat on my wife. Your were gone only two weeks and your guy was on a date with a new girl. You say it wasn't a date, but arranging to go to a movie after socializing is going on a date. And sending nudes? You really can't see how this points to a problem?
And it is likely that if she had not sent that text at that moment he might have kept it hidden from you forever.
You want to give him another chance? Just remember that now he knows a little better about how to keep it hidden from you. You may have invested 7 years with him, but after seven years he is still not trustworthy. It would probably be best to move on.22
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Most Helpful Girl
I'd dump him. Yes, 7 years is a long time to be with someone, but if he can't be faithful to you during your engagement, then what makes you think he will when you are actually married? You were only gone for two weeks. That's not a long time yet he saw it as a chance to go out on the town with some random girl he met online. I call shenanigans about him not having sex with her. He's lying through his teeth to save face. He went on a date with her. No, it wasn't hanging out. It was a date. He had sex with her. I would never go back to someone that cheated on me by having sex with another woman. Now maybe a kiss or some exchanging of nudes might, MIGHT be forgivable, but once they cross the line and have sex with someone else then I am leaving no matter what.
He has no respect for you or your relationship. No matter how long you stay with him I doubt you will be able to trust him again. If it were me, I wouldn't be able to trust him. I would be afraid to leave him alone for two minutes without thinking that he might be chatting with some other girl.
You have been faithful to him for 7 years. He has not. Why stay with someone that doesn't give you the respect you deserve. Even if his cheating was a one time thing, the fact of the matter is that he still cheated on you at the end of the day. I mean, really, you were gone for 2 WEEKS! That is not that long. He chose to cheat on you just because he was lonely and wanted to get some and since you weren't around he got it somewhere else.
You are not married to him. You can leave without having to deal with the possibility of a divorce and all the money it will cost you to get one. Take this opportunity to leave while you still have it. You guys don't have kids so there is nothing keeping you tied to him. Go find someone that is willing to treat you with the respect that you deserve.10