Why does it put me off when a guy likes me?

I enjoy talking to guys until they give a sign or tell me that they like me and then I can't get away quick enough. I prefer talking to guys who brush me off a bit or are a little insulting sometimes. Can someone explain why because I annoy myself when I ruin a chance with nice guys?


Most Helpful Guy

  • A lot of people's interests change over time. Whether it's food, style, dating, etc; your interests today will probably be different, in some way, a few years from now.

    Perhaps it's your brain's way of convincing you not to settle down yet. To live your live not worrying about others impression of you. Not that I'm saying you're selfish or anything like that. You're afraid "nice guys" will want to move too quickly in a deeper emotional attachment. So you're more drawn toward guys that seem to care less.

    This isn't necessarily a bad thing. I don't think it's anything you really need to worry about right now. Unless it's hurting you or others in an addiction like way or a physical like way, then I don't really see a reason for you to be annoyed with yourself.

    I'm kind of the same with all people. After my explanation you will probably find it won't be the same, but perhaps you will gain some insight.

    I don't really like being insulted or anything like that, but I don't usually like being complimented or anyone to show interest in me.

    It doesn't necessarily have to do with sexual attraction, though I'm sure it has some to do with it. It's mostly just people themselves. I don't hang out, date, or have friends; so in a sense, I ruined basically all forms of relationships because I don't like the feeling of people liking me.

    Unless you can go into more detail, that's about the best answer I can think of. Hope it helps, sorry if it didn't.

    • Yes I agree I just hate the feeling of a guy liking me, I go out of my way to find things in people that put me off or make me angry so I don't have any interest in talking to them anymore. I could fancy someone so badly from a distance, but once we have regular conversations and get close I have no desire to talk anymore and will eventually ignore them. I feel suffocated and claustrophobic and just need to get away. I always find myself talking to guys who I know like other girls and enjoy persuading them to ask the girl out or something, I suppose because it takes the attention away from me and I know they won't fancy me...

    • Yeah I'm not really sure why it's like that. It might just be something you need to grow out of, but it might be something else.

      I may have some deeper emotional issues with talking in person, physical contact, etc. You might have some other issues as well. I'm not saying you do, I don't know you well enough to make that claim, but it's always an option. If you feel it does become more of an issue interfering with your life, or something like that, then you may want to talk to someone about it.

      When you talk to men and women about people they like, or things like that, do you enjoy giving them advice or helping them out? Maybe you like listening to people and want to become a therapist or psychiatrist. Maybe it's a career interest your brain is focusing on.

    • I'm sure there are some people that truly like being with people that, in a sense, lack interest in them. I'm assuming that's a rare thing though. Our brains are so complex that it makes me disregard such simple explanations for motives of actions, words, and thoughts.

      I wish I had a better answer for you. Sadly, I don't know enough about how the brain works. If you ever figure out the answer, let me know; I'm always open for options.

Most Helpful Girl

  • You just find some guys "too easy"
    not a good thing, but i feel that sometimes too


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What Guys Said 2

  • Whats your definition of masculinity?(serious question and will probably be insightful as far as your problem goes)

    • Erm taking control, a bit rough, physically big, protective, self-assured, confident, a strong personality who knows what to do and what they want? A kind of 'caveman' man.

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    • The main thing that puts me off is when they get too friendly with me or show signs of having feelings for me, then I just want to get away from them, I can find someone really attractive until we become good friends then I don't have any attraction to them anymore

    • What about guys you just met? Hookups? Perhaps its because you view them as friends instead of potential romantic intrest?

  • if a guy tells you "I like u, wanna go out sometime? give me ur phone number.." , immediately then after you stop to enjoy talking with such a guy?

    • Yeah it makes me want to avoid them

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