How do you know if a girl is desperate?

If you saw a very ugly girl all dressed up (not slutty) in a bar sitting at a table having a laugh with a couple of friends, would you think she was desperate?

What signals to you that a girl is single and desperate, before you have even spoken to her? Or what makes you avoid a girl because you think she is desperate (except for being drunk and throwing herself over everyone lol) ? Thanks =]
Oh! Ok thanks guys, well I don't do any of those things you have mentioned but my sister says I'm desperate because I've not had any intimacy or a date with a guy in over 5 years... I don't FEEL desperate, I don't go out on the pull, I don't get the opportunity to flirt with guys and hell I haven't even tried online dating! But because my sister said I was desperate, I thought perhaps I was giving off some vibe I wasn't aware of!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Hmm, how about stipulating a definition for desperate and why it's supposedly bad?
    ... and desperate for what?

    Throwing yourself at people doesn't necessarily mean desperate for affection/sex, it could mean they think they're entitled enough to get from whomever they want. Or it could mean they got rejected several times and you just think they're desperate because they've talked to so many people. It might as well be a made up thing because I just don't see people as being desperate before or after speaking to them. I can imagine what the problem is though, I think it's bad if they are either way too clingy for your affection/sex or couldn't care less where the affection/sex comes from. That's the problem with it, they will get want they want from anyone and everyone which makes their affection/sex impersonal.

    I see no reason why the girl you described would be desperate. I think it's mostly a girl thing to make a massive deal about it and they project their view about people being desperate. In my experience girls never look desperate to a guy when they think they do, it's just a completely made up characteristic about themselves. But that makes them insecure and annoying. For example, not texting first or not approaching guys because you're afraid you'll look desperate. No guy thinks you're desperate but being so afraid of it made you look dumb.

    Basically there are no signals for me, if it's even a problem. I've never noticed and thought of a girl as desperate, before or after having spoken to her and this whole idea of desperation girls are always on about doesn't really click with me.


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What Guys Said 5

  • Let's see on my 1st date a girl:

    1 - Kept poking me
    2 - Kept touching me
    3 - Kept rubbing her hands against me
    4 - Kept trying to slap my ass
    5 - Kept being in-my-face.
    6 - We had sex

    This is what I call desperate when you reach point #6. SEX. And this was with 6-7/10 girl. In the end I wondered "WTF". What you said is nothing special to make one seem desperate.

  • how i tell is she is glancing at every guy in the bar and is trying desperately to act sweet. I have worked with my bud he runs the bar i work in the kitchen on occasion and I have seen many girls acting innocent but definitely putting on a show.

  • First question: No, those dots don't even connect.
    Second question: She would be overly persistent to be physically close, and very clingy.

  • Same as a guy, he or she has very low standards.

  • Being publicly sexual acting like a stripper.
    Grinding, groping for the D.
    Any slutty behavior really, or any other behavior that oozes 'I've got no self-respect'.

    Laughing it up with a few friends?
    Nah... would hardly notice... pretty common behavior.


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