Why am I so enamored with this man?

Like he has a lot of awesome traits but there's really nothing necessarily special about him. If i put him in a lineup of other guys that wanna get with me BAD most girls would take the other guys. But its like everything about him i like more than the other guys im dating atm. When I'm with them i wish i was with him and he rarely makes time for me.

Its so frustrating because after a year he's still hot and cold. Oneday he seems like he's ready to go all in the next i feel like he's forgotten me. I told him recently i thought i wasfalling in love and ge said he had feelings for me too andmade a bunch of promises to keep me around but that wasweeks ago and he still hasn't seen me since.

Why do i like him so much and howcan i stop being so hung up? Is he just playimg me? I don't get his end game here. I just wanna move past him bit i fedl like im stuck and its starting to be a pain


Most Helpful Guy

  • Block him entirely. All social media, his phone and any app you can contact each other on. Get rid of his photos and delete all the texts or messages he sends you. I guarantee he is purposefully being hot and cold and you walked straight into his plan. A lot of guys do that. It makes you super dependent on them. He doesn't truly care for you because if he did he wouldn't be distant half the time. He's got you by the balls (metaphor).

    Don't try to rationalize taking him back when he's nice to you when you know in the back of your mind he's not good for you and that's what you're trying to convince that he's good when he's not.

    • I don't kniw i feel like he's well intioned its just his life is chaotic. But maybe you're right, maybe im just blind

    • I know it's hard. Infatuation can make you look past the negatives (even if the negative is what is causing the infatuation). But it sounds like he's really messing with your brain and making it hard for you to enjoy spending time with others so you need to just cut it off now. It won't feel good and you'll miss him but after awhile he will fade from your memory.

    • You're right. Thats hard to hear but i genuinely think you're right. he's starting to affect my ability to make new relationships with people who will make time and thats not okay

Most Helpful Girl

  • Forget about him and move on.


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What Guys Said 3

  • try to get down to the root cause of the attraction, learn it, define it, then you can easily do what you want to do from there.

    • he's a good person with principles. Other guys i date might be more what your average girl would go for but i look at him and i think.. you're a better man then all of them. Real men are to find:(

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    • Tbh i kind of want to learn sonething disillusioning, it'd help me forget him

    • if so then you'll have to start digging. you dig deep enough you always find dirt.

  • Attitude is king if everything else works out good enough.

  • You can't help who you like, it just happens. But from my own experiences, I wouldn't tell a girl i had feelings for her if I didn't, so after him telling you he has feelings for you too, I would talk with him to know were you stand. Nobody wants to get mixed feelings, it's not a nice place to be, and if you do wanna move past him, don't forget he is one guy, among millions out there.


What Girls Said 0

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