How to refuse a guy?

I have very strict parents who control every bit of my life- checks my phone, does not allow me to have many frieds, does not let me go out nor allows anyone to come over (yes that conservative and unrealistic)

So way back, i bumped into this guy, got along pretty well but then stopped communicating. He only recently started talking to me again and has tried once again to ask my to go out, have a coffee and hang out (he tried for 1-2 years in trying to get me out) but every time I've refused him and explained my situation to him yet he would not take it as an excuse, so being stupid me, i said we could hang out during the upcoming weekend, when i know i cannot in any way

How do i get out of this now guys?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, if you want to get out of it, you need to be firm with your 'no', and stand your ground. End communication if necessary.

    If you like this guy and want to spend time with him, then you have some thinking to do.

    You are in a tricky situation, being 24 years old and having parents control you like that. I've seen this before, and it usually ends up with an estranged relationship with parents/children. The adult children will spend time with that person anyway, behind their parents back.

    Good luck!


Most Helpful Girl

  • i think that the real problem here is the way your parents acts towards you! man that's not alright for them to be like that... you're 24!!!

    • im actually 20, but i know, gets really crap, but what can i do

    • try to live at a friends/relative place... or move out...

    • thing is my friends know how tight my parents are hence they do not want to endorse me going against my parents or them having to get on my parents' bad side therefore that's not possible as for relatives, dont have any

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • You have to get out its from your crazy family, sorry...
    They are killing you slowly.

    • Do you kinda like the guy? He's nice with you?

      Maybe you both can be friends?

      If he's cool, dont run from him. Try to find a way to be in contact with him.
      He may be important to help you getting out of here and making you feel better.

      Do your parents see your emails too?

    • LOL i think they would if they could, they constantly check my phone though

      right now, im just seeing things through platonic eyes but after explaining to him about my parents and being held down by my parents, he hasn't provided any form of aid in order for the meeting to occur so this gives my second thoughts about him

  • That is terrible, you're 24!

    Can't you move out?


What Girls Said 3

  • You are 24. Stand against their controlling attitude. You need to remind them that you are an adult.

  • Tell him something came up, or that your parents found out and won't let you go

    • No, the problem is her family, not the guys, she need them...
      She cannot continue rejecting with fear.

    • Show All
    • Yeah, dont be passive, dont accept it.

    • If you want something only you can achieve it. If you like this boy or feel like you want more freedom your going to have to talk to your family about it and try to make them understand that you are not a child anymore and need your own freedom. You could also move out and explore the world by yourself, you are 24?
      I think you're getting tired of being so sheltered and not allowed to do anything, if you want to do something you gotta fight for it.

  • Wow, what's with your parents? ;/

    • theyre Asian and strict as ever is what's with my parents :(((

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