My boyfriend teams up with his female co-worker every year for their work football pool. They pick teams together and if they win they split the cash. Well I told him this year that I don't want him teaming up with her because he's dating me. He refuses to listen to me though. He said all they do is pick teams together, and that they're just friends. I know she has (or did) have a crush on him. I've known them both for six years. Six years ago she told me she had a major crush on him. She has a boyfriend now, but that's not the point.
I just don't feel comfortable with them teaming up. I am angry that he refuses to back out of their team. He is with ME now.
Don't I have the right to be angry?
- YesVote A
- NoVote B
Most Helpful Guy
Don't ever feel guilty for being Jealous, it's perfectly normal for people to feel this emotion and people have different triggers.
Now, i wouldn't exactly have gone right out with "i don't want you to be on her team this year." Rather i would said something along the lines of:
"hi boyfriend, i love you and am so glad we are together as i love every minute of it but i do want to bring something up that's been on my mind. I trust you and hope you win this year but you teaming with your female co-worker that you've known forever makes me feel a jealous because i don't like another girl potential getting closer to you.
Now i know this has been a tradition of yours but my female intuition says that she has a thing for you even though she's in a relationship. Now in a perfect world she'd get fired and i'd never have to deal with this again but i know that's not rational.
Just as long as you know this and do what to you can to evoke the least amount of jealousy makes me feel better, i love you!"
So often people feel guilty for being jealous, people have different thresholds. i've known couples who can care less if they see their partner twerk and dance on other people at clubs when alcohol but get freaked out if their partner goes and gets help from another person.
Your gut is probably right that there is some tension with her + him, but letting him know is okay too.. if he's a good guy he'll be sure to mind that sensitive subject.2
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