So the first time I found out about this female friend was two weeks after meeting him. One evening we were texting each other and I asked him what he was doing, he answered not much just chilling. I called him a few hours later and he said he's at his friend house, then he gave the phone to this friend.. it was a woman!! she was like hi, nice to meet you, a short conversation, I was trying to be friendly but I was uncomfortable to say the least and then my boyfriend was back on. Later that night he sent me a photo of himself in his house.
After that he didn't say anything about that friend and I didn't ask as I didn't want to seem insecure. Some weeks later when I was taking a train to his house we agreed to meet at the station, he came in a car driven by.. yes, the female friend. She then gave us a lift to my boyfriend house. I had a feeling my boyfriend was coming from her house tbh but I still tried to put a brave face and didn't say anything.
Some weeks later we had an argument where I let the steam out.. I shouted at him asking what he was doing at her house that night, asking doesn't she have a man, his answer was he doesn't know! I asked him how he would feel if I did the same, he said he has never stopped me from having friends. He said he can stop seeing her if i want to, i thought it shouldn't be my decision, it should be his too.
What I find hard to deal with is that he thinks it's perfectly normal to go to this womans house, I find it disrespectful, when it's just the two of them. I woudnt be able to deal with this insecurity in the long term, I have been cheated on in the past but I dont think I have major trust issues without a reason to. How can I know for sure if they are just friends? I live an hour away, they live in the same area. What do you