Why would he ask me to hang out alone, and just flake?

There is this guy at work that I like that over the past month or too we have been flirting and talking a lot. We talk about dating (not with each other, just in general), and he has been giving me a lot of signs that he likes me. We always talk about hanging out but never have. I have been waiting for him to ask me "for real. " So yesterday I was leaving work and he walked me to the door and asked what I was doing that night. I said I didn't know anymore because my friend had just flaked out a few minutes before. He said, "well if you are bored call me if you want to hang out because I have nothing to do tonight. " So I was like, "oh yeah! Let's do something! " and he said, "ok, what do you want to do? " and I said that he could come to my apartment and we could figure it out from there. He said alright cool, and that when he got off he would go home, take a shower, and call me when he's ready. I drove home all excited, got ready, and waited. But, nothing happened. Not a text, a call, nothing. I know he worked like 11 hours yesterday so I thought maybe he fell asleep or something. I am half worried and half confused, ok, really confused. This was a Saturday night. Why would he ask me to hang out alone, and just flake? That has never happened to me before. What should I do? I don't even know if it was a date or not because we haven't talked about our feelings. Maybe he doesn't even like me. Agh.


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  • I think, from what you have described, that he just got a bit scared about the whole situation and couldn't go through with it. Girls don't realize that guys can get really intimidated, especially when there is a lot of pressure on them to conform to societal norms. When you see or talk to him again, don't bring up this whole situation and let him bring it up and apologize. If he doesn't apologize, but asks you out again, just give him a second chance and see how he behaves. If he repeats his behavior again, then I would not pursue anything with him.

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