How to have the what are we talk?

Something that really scares me is having a serious talk about what you are and where you are going with someone. It is terrifying to put myself in a vulnerable position like that where I have to confess my feelings for him. How do you do it, I mean through texting or maybe in person and how do you even say it? We have been seeing each other and I know he likes me but right now it is very confusing and I feel like the only way is to have a heart to heart conversation. I've been emotionally distant as I'm super afraid of getting hurt so I would like to open up even if it means that he may not be feeling the same.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Although I usually find texting much less intimidating, face to face is definitely the way to do it.

    I think that the best way to do it is towards the middle/end of a casual date, when you're both feeling relaxed and stress free, and then find a way to say "so what are we right now?". When I did this with my boyfriend, I think the conversation went a bit like this :

    Us - both talking and laughing normally
    Me -*stares in that 'i like you're way*
    Him - what?
    Me - I just really like you, you know?
    Him - I like you too lex (my name)
    Me- I just... What are we? I mean, are we just friends, or something more, or what should I introduce you as if we bump into someone I know?
    Him - what would you like us to be?
    Me - that depends... What would you like us to be?
    Him - I'd like to call you my girlfriend... if that's okay?
    Me - *blushing furiously at this point* umm, yeah, I'd like that. I'd really like that. So we're together then? As in dating?
    Him - I think so
    Me - cool

    And that was that!


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  • The only way to do it is to ask straight up.


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