Is this supportive or disrespectful?

My boyfriend and his family have been going through a LOT of suffering recently, both his grandmother and grandfather are having issues and it's causing my boyfriends family a lot of financial issues, he's been having a hard time lately with dealing with this and I've found that he hasn't spoken about it to me much, he only just vented to me about it and now I have an urge to be there for him through all of this, because before I wasn't aware of the severity of the situation. Him and his family have to pack up his grandfathers house, sell it, etc and do work together on it to get it gone, plus he goes and visits them frequently in the hospital, would it be supportive or disrespectful of me to go along with him, or even ask to be able to help him with cleaning up, etc? I think he wants me there, he just says he doesn't want me to feel the stress that he does atm


Most Helpful Guy

  • it would not be disrespectful to tell him you would love to help. You tell him you two are friends first, and you want to help your friend. Not out of obligation but out of love and friendship. Then tell him you will help anyway he needs if, but here are some specific things you know you could do: x, y and z

    • What are some ways I could ask to help without sounding invasive? Like I know he wouldn't let me help unless I pushed him because he thinks that he's putting me under pressuring, etc, but I do know he'd want me there, he's just reluctant with allowing me to be

    • You can tell him that part of friendships is letting one another help with one another burdens... So a few ideas: you could bring the whole family a meal or some snacks on a day they are packing or doing something. You can offer to help them pack or move something. I am sure there are other things you can do... but those are some thoughts. Sorry i am not more helpful.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Help as much as you can.
    He'll appreciate it... trust me!

    It's definitely not disrespectful.
    I would consider "disrespect" telling him that you don't want to hear about his problems anymore, or showing that you are physically unsupportive.
    You are doing the complete opposite.
    You have nothing to be doubtful about.

    You seem like a loving, caring, and wonderful girlfriend <3


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 3

  • Definitely supportive. You're an awesome girlfriend

  • its supportive!

  • You can help him to clean but don't go to the hospital unless you're asked. It's a family matter

    • So it wouldn't be seen as intruding by his other family members to go along and clean up his grandfathers house do you think? :)

    • No because they're not sick...

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