Not telling my partner excatly everything?

though you are in a relationship i dont think you have to share everything with your partner. im going through a really tough time with my mental health and im doing my best to clear things up. But im not going to tell the guy im dating about this cause first of all dont want to, and second of all i dont think he would realise the seriousness of the situation really. he's quite a nice and postive guy and i just dont think he would take it as serious as it is. i dont think its an easy thing to to, and ''hiding'' these sort of things from someone i like is quite hard. and i know he will probly eventually find out sooner or later. but for now, i dont want to talk to him about it. as a matter of a fact im not even telling my parents and relatives about it.
i think no ones ever told their partner excatly everything about themselfs. and i think im doing the right thing in this relationship.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it's okay to keep some personal issues to yourself and not share them with your significant other, to some degree. If this is a new relationship I understand why you'd be hesitant on sharing everything.
    However, If your boyfriend cares about you he should feel comfortable talking about such issues with you. If anything, he should be the shoulder for you to lean on during tough times. It's not good to keep things bottled up (I've been there) and opening up to someone you trust might be the healthiest thing for you right now.


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What Guys Said 3

  • I think the answer is a great big "IT DEPENDS". There are so many factors, but you are right to reach out. I think that you need to have someone that cares about you that you can confide in. That might be this boyfriend, but as a parent, I would say a sibling or one of your parents. i believe that while you don't want to "over share" with a boyfriend, isolating yourself could be a bigger mistake. Hang in there and know that things will get better!

    • thank you first of all. second of all, the reason why i dont want to confide too my siblings or my parents are cause they dont actually realise how serious this is eithere. and they dont even take these sort of things serious eithere. they just tell me to shape the fuck or and to stop being sad. I mean seriously? thats not something you do. its so mutch more to be then just to be sad. im fine with telling the guy im seeing that im sad, but as you said, i dont want to overshare things with him. i also (strangely enough) feel better when i isolate myself. i dont like sharing things tbh with everyone and everything.

    • Do you have a best friend or a sibling? I don't want to make this more serious than it is, but sometimes these situations can turn into something where you think of harming yourself. You have to know that no matter what, there are ALWAYS people out there who care about you. I know someone who has ups and downs in her emotions and after talking to her doctor, she has started using Lexipro with good results. I'm usually the last to suggest medication, but there's a time & place for everything. Hang in there!

  • I can see why you dont want to share these things with people.
    But atm my girlfriend is struggling with depression and anxiety. She hasn't told me much about it but I can see it. She won't talk about it and because of that I can't offer my help, I am there for her and I want to help her. but i can't because she won't let me in there into that part of her life. If he cares for you then I reckon he knows, because no matter how well you think you are hidding it it does show to those who care about you and they wil wan to help you. and for me not being able to help her is very hard on me and i want to be there for her.

  • Bonds are created when you endure tough times together.

    • he's not going to bond with me cause of sutch a fucking thing. im enduring the tough times. not him, or our relationship. honestly, what you said to me dosent really make sense tbh.

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    • i just wrote in the text that im not going to be telling him cause he won't be understanding how serious the situation is. And i also think making your partner feel bad for something that he can't even put his mind into is really strange and egoistic. i dont want him to take an emtionall toll on something that im going through.

    • i can understand if the condition is terminal, with a cap on life expenctancy of a year or two. then for sure it makes logical sense to live out your last years as if you were completely healthy.

      i apologize for coming off pushy. its tough to address vaguety without facts. wish you the best.

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