How do I stop getting approached so often?

I know this ask could possibly backfire and I could get a lot of hate, but I need to ask this because I'm getting really frustrated lately.
I'm getting hit on/complimented a lot. Like, a LOT. I recently went natural (meaning I have shorter curly hair now) and part of the reason I sped up the process to do that is because I was hoping that if I cut most of my hair off that I would get less attention.
It has increased ten-fold.
It's gotten to the point where if I'm sitting alone at the mall I almost expect someone to say something to me/approach me. Both happen several times a week and as I get older I'm getting more and more sick of it... a few times a month is fine but I kind of have social anxiety anyway, so all these random people constantly approaching me gets more and more difficult as time continues.
Girls, are there any strategies that you have to put on a "please don't distub me at the moment" vibe? I don't like the advice to put on an RBF because I'm not trying to be rude to people who clearly mean no harm, but I just want this stuff to sloooow down lol. Headphones don't always work, so I need something a little stronger.
And guys, in what situations would you not approach a girl?
Pleaseeee don't say "wear less make-up" and "cover up more" because a) I don't wear any make-up (sometimes I do fill in my eyebrows but not everyday, and it seems to have no effect on the amount that people find me attractive), and I also wear clothes grandparent approved lol.
My mom thinks I'm giving off too much of an approachable vibe, but I'm not really sure how to stop that?
If you need to see my pictures (although I'm not sure how that could help) look at the first ask I posted and I added some.

Thanks guys!!!


Most Helpful Guy

  • What I do to stop getting approached so often is to just put on my best Kanye West face.. It makes you look completely disinterested in everything you do which makes people less likely to approach you.

    • Wow that is... a face alright... damn does he usually look like that? Lol
      If it works for you then surely it would work for me! I will give it a whirly :) thanks!

    • I really don't get approached that often but yeah this would probably work lol
      You're very welcome!

    • Thanks for MH!

Recommended Questions


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • Wear sunglasses. Everyone's more intimidating when wearing sunglasses because you can't see their eyes and that hides a lot of their facial expressions.

  • Do clown face contouring... but then don't do the finished results bit.

    As @Octavius mentioned, try wearing sunglasses and maybe also try to always be around friends. Strangers would feel really intimidated and nervous to approach you while you're in a group compared to if you're just alone.

    • Omg that sounds like a lot of effort, but at this point I'm pretty much willing to try anything at this point. Funny suggestion, I liked it :D
      I will also try travelling in a pack, yes. Thank you very much!!

    • Show All
    • If you're ever alone, put in your earphones and talk to your phone. You could still do whatever you want like texting, but at the same time you are busy having a conversation. Only trick is to make it look convincing, otherwise you'll have to sacrifice your phone-time for a pretend conversation to your grandmother - who you should really call sometime!

    • Oh... I tried the phone thing and I guess I wasn't convincing enough cuz he called after me like "Yeah suuuuure, on the phone" or some shit like that... I shall improve my acting skills! lol
      I haven't talked to my Grammy in about two weeks... I feel terrible now, I will contact her soon ><
      Thanks again, I really appreciate your help :)

  • Be on your phone with earbuds on. If they approach you, pretend you didn't hear/notice them.

    • Yeah this is what I usually do, although I usually cave in and acknowledge them... 😑
      I think you're right, pretending not to see them would be better. Thanks!!

  • just be yourself then no one approaches you.

  • Hey, you come here often?


What Girls Said 5

  • Stop smiling so much?

    You have a really infectious smile.. and smiles, make you seem happy and approachable.

    • Awwww thank you very much!!
      But I hope you don't think I'm just smiling to myself all the time!! Lol 😂
      Thank you for your compliment/input and I will remember to stop smiling at myself if I ever start hahaha

    • I bet you smile more then you realize.

    • Omg you are so right!!
      I was on Tumblr in the food court at the mall, and I caught myself smiling at my phone dozens of times! I never even noticed before... but I will take note not to do it unless I WANT to be approached :D
      Thanks so much, you're advice is golden <3

  • Probably just a like able person/ vibe. I have chronic b*tch face sooo... Yeah I don't have these issues since people think I'm mean but I'm not lol. My bestfriend has this issue though. Just tell them you're not interested when they approach you and soon it'll be second nature, you won't even notice saying it

  • Umm put sunglasses?

  • Try adopting unwelcoming body language (crossed arms, no eye contact, crossed legs, stuff like that), and consider wearing more black. As much as I love the color, it does make people seem a little less approachable, as if they want to be left alone.

    Sometimes when I'm on my phone, I furrow my brows, frown, and pretend I'm doing something important. People usually won't talk to you if you're doing that, haha.

  • Watch your body language, if you look tired or bored guys won't feel comfortable approaching you.

    • True! So I'll just start pretend sleeping and maybe that will be "looking tired" enough 😉
      Thanks girlie!!

Recommended myTakes